Nevermore

Confessions

OMG it makes me so mad that each page on word is only half a page on Wattpad! WHAT?!

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*ADRIAN*

It's been a month since my date with Anastasia. Since then, I've been in and out of the hospital, with check-ups and a whole new list of perscriptions. I've also been scheduled to start my first chemotherapy session soon as my symptoms have worsened a bit.

I've also done a little research myself. Chronic lymphocytic leukemia (CLL) is a type of cancer that causes the body to produce large numbers of white blood cells. Sounds good, right? Because after all, as far as I used to know, the main problem with cancer was that the chemo could leave a person with a lack of white blood cells. But though my body was producing a massive amount of lymphocytes, they were practically useless in fighting infections and they were causing there to be less room for healthy blood cells.

Truth be told, I was scared to go through chemo. I was sick of the doctors and nurses telling me, "chemotherapy will make you feel healthier and better" when we both knew what chemo could do to a person. Sure, it killed the cancer cells, but what about my body? As time would go on, I would get weaker. I would have to get over that though, as in three days, I would be starting chemo.

"I want you to take it easy," my mom was saying as we left the hospital. I wasn't paying her much attention. I was occupied with my own thoughts. We were going over to my grandmother's later for dinner and I was looking forward to it. Mostly because I liked being out in my grandmother's garden. Since I was three, I would help her tend to the garden.

"If you'd like, you could bring a friend over to grandma's," my mom continued to say. I pondered over that for a minute. I'd never brought Anastasia to the garden before. I'd like her to see it, I think.

As soon as I got home, I hopped on the couch, grabbing the phone off the side and dialing Anastasia's number. I waited, nervously, as the phone rang, for her to pick up. Finally, on the third ring, she answered.

"Hello?" I sighed in relief.

"Hey, it's me."

"Adrian? Well, hey! How are you? You haven't been at school much lately and it worries me." Right. I've been in and out of school a lot and she still didn't know I had CLL. I guess it must have slipped my mind.

"Things have just been hectic. We're going to my grandma's house today. Do you want to come and keep me company?" I asked playfully.

"Me? Did you ask Kaden?"

"I'm asking you." She giggled and I couldn't resist the smile that was tugging at the corners of my lips.

I was pleased to see her at my front door within the following hour. "Can we call this a date too?" I asked in a playful tone. She laughed, giving my arm a light punch and rolling her eyes.

When we got to grandma's house, I unabashedly took Anastasia's hand and lead her out to the garden. The adults would probably be discussing my chemo and that was something I did not want to stick around for. That and Anastasia still didn't know about any of this yet.

Anastasia gasped beside me. "Wow," she breathed, "Adrian, this is beautiful!"

"I've been helping my grandma take care of this place since I was a kid," I said flopping down into the grass and closing my eyes, using one arm as a pillow and the other as a shield from the sun. She joined me. "This is my happy place," I continued. She simply smiled and we both took a moment to just silently enjoy where we were, taking it all in through our senses.