Insanity (a PewdieCry fanfiction)

(Twenty) Supervision

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Pewdie/Felix

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In the weeks day's Ryan's been out of the hospital after Christmas I have been persistent on keeping him on those blue pills, twice a day, everyday. He doesn't know he's schizophrenic, he thinks the pills are to recover from the fire accident or something. We haven't spoken at all of what the blue pills are, they sit in the plastic container labeled with the days of the week next to his toothbrush, I took the pill bottle with the label into my room and shoved it someplace I hope he wouldn't look. I didn't know how to tell him. The nurse should have done it, dammit.

There hasn't been any sort of episode or insanity-induced laughter since he's started (not that he had many of those moments before), but these meds were only an acute phase, in time he'll have to get a different dosage prescribed by a mental health specialist. I couldn't keep it from him for much longer.

I'm interrupted by the sound of an abrupt facet and the quiet sound of the plastic pill holder popping open. I can hear Ryan fish out his pills for depression and the blue pill with his fingers and a cup fill with water. There's a pause in the bathroom and then a breathy sigh, the one Ryan gives out after he takes his doses.

"When do I get to quit with these blue pills? I mean, I only got a lil' burnt during the fire. Don't see why I gotta keep takin' them at this point." Rayn says from the bathroom. He appears in the frame of the door merely a second after, awaiting an answer.

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Cry/Ryan

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I look to Felix for a response. He's still sitting in the bed in his pajamas, his dirty blond hair falls over his forehead and a few stray strands poke out from his head. He's cute with bedhead, I almost didn't notice the awkward expression on his face.

He doesn't bother to scramble when he's thinking of a response, his face just twists in a manner that gives away that what he's about to tell you is bullshit, but it was thought out bullshit. I don't bother waiting to hear an excuse.

"Oh, what? I have a chronic disorder from all the smokey air I breathed in or something?" I was joking, mostly. I laughed strained, all too breathy. It showed my concern. I look to him again for a comforting and most importantly, an honest answer.

He looks askance and diverts his eyes. "Well, it's chronic. And... a disorder. A mental disorder." He laughs too, the type of laugh someone adds when trying to make a heavy sentence light. "I only found out about it a few days ago, while we were at the hospital..." Felix trails on. He's trying to cushion the impact of whatever he's about to say as I stand there stiff.

"It's schizophrenia."

"No way."

"Ryan, they did testing and shit. The nurse told me in the hallway and gave me a bottle of anti psychotics to hold you off until you see a psychiatrist. It's not as bad as you think, I promise." This is where Felix scrambles, I guess he can see that I'm not taking it too lightly.

"I'm fine," I say angrily, "whatever testing they did was bullshit, Felix. I don't fall asleep at a Christmas party and wake up the next day with a severe mental illness." I go back into the bathroom and I pick out the blue pills from the Friday, Saturday and Sunday holders. I ball up the pills in my fist as I hear Felix approach me. He puts his hands on my shoulders and softens his features to perhaps calm me down. It wasn't working.

I drop the pills down the sink while staring at him.

"Oh, come on, Ryan! Was that all fucking necessary?" Felix tightens his grip a bit on my shoulders and I try to shrug him off.

There's a sound from somewhere else in the house. Ken's awake.

"I'm serious about this, bro." Felix says before letting go, my tense shoulders relax and I push past him to sit at the computer.

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Pewdie/Felix

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God. Fucking. Dammit. There wasn't much point to trying to dig out the pills from the pipes at this point. I was in the bathroom alone with the door shut trying to know what to do next. Ryan was ignoring me, at least for now. We didn't normally fight at all, any disagreements were solved with sex, if there were any disagreements. Every relationship has it's hard spot, I suppose. This one being mental illness and a strong denial. Come on, Ryan's smarter than this...

I looked up some psychiatrists in our Florida area, maybe if a trained professional dressed up fancy with a fucking clipboard told Ryran he was sick, he'd believe it that time. Plus, the guy probably needed to talk some things out because he wasn't too keen on baring his soul and neither was I.

The costs was about $500 for initial consultation, which wasn't too bad. Being a popular youtuber came in handy for these things, but it was still sort of spendy. It was for Ryan. I scheduled an appointment with a place nearby a week from now, it'll give time for this simmering tension between them to fizzle out. At least for now, I could leave the bathroom.

I draped my arms across Ryan's shoulders, he tenses immediately. It's usually him who's affectionate and kissy and cute, but right now it was the cold shoulder. I sigh out and sink down, still trying to hold onto him from his computer chair. I want to say something but I don't know what.

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Ken

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I was waken to bickering down the hall, I couldn't make out exactly what was said but it was probably over something petty. Cry and Pewdie hardly fought, ever since they went to the park days ago they've been all over each other. They didn't tell me they were dating, but I could hear the smooching and whispering and... fucking. I wanted to be him, Felix, intimate with Cry. It was such a fucking tease, living under the roof of two homos, watching your man crush get snatched up by a friend. Pewdie's a great guy... but Jesus Christ, Cry was a rebound for Marzia, Sophie was a rebound for Cry, and Cry was a rebound for Sophie. It went full circle, it was fucking stupid.

Luckily, within time, it won't be a problem.

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sry if it's bad i just wanted 2 see if i could pretend to know what i was doing. anyway ya