Bulletproof

6b. Alice

Seokjin feels fragile to her. Far too fragile to last in the world of war. She could send him over layered in three suits of Kevlar and he would still be returned to the sender broken. Shattered.

His hand is a collection of bones in hers. His thin wrist is an invitation to draw mahogany blood. The chin she called sharp in a dream of a romance is as menacing as a spoon in the face of what he is about to bear witness to.

But the worst indication of his weakness is his eyes.

The round irises that glimmer down at her are too deep, too rich, too beautiful to watch the chaos of unrestricted death unfold. Those eyes hold the knowledge of the workings of the world, and with it, the knowledge of the world's horrors. But they remain optimistic, unspoiled. Hopeful. She knows when he comes back, if he comes back at all, that spark of innocence that led her to him will have vanished.

The tears she sheds are not in fear but acceptance. She is not scared of Seokjin dying; she is ruined by the inevitability of the death of the man she knew.

Seokjin hugs his father, and she is surprised to see tears glittering on the stern older man's face. She wishes they could have a more private goodbye, but there's no time now.

"I'm sorry, son," he chokes out. "We came here...so you could avoid being swept into the insanity of the world...but now you're being sent off to...t-to..." He doesn't finish. He can only hold his young boy in his arms until Seokjin starts to pull away.

His mother envelops him tightly, arms shaking and sobs spilling from her mouth.

"My son!" she cries repeatedly. "Oh my son!" Horrible, ugly noises fill the air as she struggles to breathe under the weight of her grief.

"It's okay, Mom," he whispers, voice trembling. "It's going to be okay." He rubs her back in circular motions with his broad hands.

She remembers when those hands first touched hers two years ago. Seokjin had taken a summer job at the ice cream parlor five blocks from her house to help pay for school. She took her little sister to that shop every two weeks when she got paid to treat her to something their parents were loathe to provide.

When Seokjin first became a recurring face during her summer trips to the parlor, she hadn't thought much of it. He didn't immediately strike her as cute or attractive, but he was always kind, making sure her sister's order was exactly right and never skimping on whatever topping she asked for.

It had been a particularly sweltering Friday with no clouds overhead to offer a semblance of protection from the full force of the sun's rays. Dripping in perspiration, she and her sister burst into the store desperate for chilly refreshment. Of course, the line was excruciatingly long, and by the time she got to the counter where Seokjin stood, she was beyond irritable. He rang up their orders, amicable as always, but she didn't feel much like exchanging pleasantries. She paid and squeezed into a corner booth to eat her ice cream in peace with her sister.

After they were done, they stood and headed towards the exit, but enough people had dripped splatters of their half-melted treats onto the floor that the tile was unbearably slick. She lost her footing and went down hard. Seokjin scurried out from behind the counter to help her up, and she grudgingly accepted, cheeks burning with embarrassed anger.

"Thanks," she grumbled, straightening her skirt. She grabbed her sister's hand roughly, ready to storm out and just get home.

But Seokjin had other plans.

His hand slid into her free one.

"Wait."

She whirled around to face him, annoyance evident in her features.

"Would you--um--like to--to go out s-sometime? I mean, w-with me, or..."

Caught completely be surprise, the tension drained from her body. She dropped her sister's hand and stared at Seokjin.

"What?"

His face turned bright red as he swallowed and tried again. "I was just--I'm sorry. I was just thinking maybe you'd l-let me take you out sometime--l-like on a-a date or something. Because you're just r-really pretty and n-nice so I thought--I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have asked--"

"Yes," she had interrupted, glad that something had come along to change her mood. "A date...would be lovely. When?"

"Uh..." he stuttered, seemingly surprised that she'd accepted. "How about next Friday at 6?"

"Sure. That sounds perfect."

Both their faces had broken into wide smiles. They stood there for a moment before he bowed and said he needed to get back to the counter.

As she ushered her sister out of the store, she turned back and waved to Seokjin. He waved back enthusiastically, a cute grin stretching across his thick, rosy lips.

Now, the corners of those pink lips that felt like velvet against her own are pulled down, quivering, in a heartbreaking frown as he hugs her sister.

"Seokjin, please be careful," her little sister whispers.

He holds her, cupping his hand behind her head, as if she is his blood-related sister.

"We're both going to be strong now, Hannah, okay?"

Hannah nods and wipes her eyes, planting a quick but sincere kiss on his cheek.

She notices that he doesn't promise Hannah he's going to come back the way some people might. Seokjin was always a positive man, but he wasn't naïve. And he was never one to tell lies.

When Seokjin walks towards her, her heart constricts with the echo of his every step against the pavement.

He pauses and takes her hands in his before she breaks down.

"Jin!" All she can manage is his name. He takes her in his arms, and together, they sink to their knees.

"Please don't cry too much, darling. You know I hate to see you cry." His eyes are rimmed with red, and his voice is unsteady as he tries to smile. He gently swipes his thumb under her bottom lashes.

"Jin." She inhales deeply to get the shaking of her breaths under control. When she speaks again, her voice is firm with the severity of her next statement, her next command. "I know you. You are kind and compassionate and that is the reason I am in love with you." She flashes her left hand in front of his face. He smiles at the unadorned gold band around her ring finger. "That's why I agreed to this.

"But when you go out there, you cannot be that person. You are going to become a parent to every member of whatever team you get put on. I know that. But, Jin, I'm begging you. If it has to be you or them, promise me you will let it be them."

Jin's eyes are wide as he realizes just what it is she is asking. She grabs his left hand and holds it between their faces.

"Please."