Her Nightmare's Hell

Sixty-One

My eyes was locked to the sky above. My chin is resting on the top of my knee as I hugged it with both of my arms. The cold gentle wind swiped my hair to the left. Alone in this dark starry sky, I feel secure and safe. As if I have truly found the place that I belong, unlike before.

This is it, huh? After how many years, I can finally say I made it. I am finally able to take the revenge that I have always wanted to those people that made me this way. Tomorrow will be the night that everyone will pay. I never thought I would be this less excited about it.

Am I missing something? Am I still not satisfied? What is missing para maramdaman ko ang tuwang gusto kong maramdaman? It feels so empty, yet satisfying to know that I have achieved this far. So what could be missing from me?I have my friends and family supporting me. I have myself to back me up. Kaya ano pa ba ang kailangan ko para maging masaya ako?

Inalis ko sa pagkayakap ang isang kamay ko sa binti ko at pinagmasdan ito ng mabuti. Anong kulang sa plano ko kung meron na ako ng inaasam ko? No. Walang kulang. Maybe I am not feeling it, yet. Maybe it's delayed dahil ayaw ko pang maramdaman ang tuwa because I don't want to assume everything will turn out the way I want it to be. Or-

"Andito ka lang pala. Kanina ka pa namin hinahanap," rinig ko sa boses ni Ivan sa bandang likuran ko.

I slightly turned my head to face him. "Yeah. I've been here for an hour now," sagot ko.

Ivan smiled to me while coming out of a medium window. I am in the rooftop right now in my dad's house. After being discharge from the ospital a month ago, daddy Zander decided that I should live with him instead of being alone in my condo.

"Lagi ka na lang andito pag may iniisip ka," Ivan sat next to me. "May problema ba, Little Monster?" there he go again with his 'Little Monster.'

I shook my head. "Nothing," I looked up again. "I just like the fresh air at night. Hindi ko kasi nagagawa 'to sa condo ko," I answered to him.

"Ah," he answered back and I felt his right bicep near mine.

Ivan also started to live with us. Daddy Zander doesn't mind because I lived with him before, but Tita Aida begged the differ. Tita Aida thinks it's not a good idea that Ivan and I should be in the same roof considering we are adult now.

Not that it matters to me, but I don't think there's anything wrong with having Ivan live with us. Besides, nagiisa lang naman siya dito sa Pilipinas habang ang ibang pamilya niya ay nasa Amerika. Even if he did have a choice to live with Veronica, hindi papayag si Veronica. She doesn't like having people in her condo.

"So tomorrow, huh?" Ivan broke the ice between us.

I slowly nodded. "Yup. Tomorrow is the big day."

"Are you sure you still want to go through it? Pwede ka pang mag back out hangga't maaga, Little Monster. You don't need to stress yourself anymore since andito na sila Tito at Tita. You can st-"

"If I back down now, then everything I have done up to now will be a waste," nilingon ko si Ivan. His already looking at me. "I know you're worried, but I can handle this. Besides, I am not alone anymore. I have all the people I need to support me," I showed him a faded smile.

Napaiwas ng tingin si Ivan sa'kin at napatayo sa pagkaupo niya. Sinundan ko siya ng tingin and Ivan's head is turned away from me. While his left arm is suddenly holding on his left side of his neck. I wonder what happened to him?

"T-That's right. Hindi ka na pala katulad ng dati," he coughed. "You can fight for yourself now, unlike before," then he nodded. "Yeah. You aren't my Little Monster anymore," tono palang ng boses niya pakiramdam ko kinakabahan na siya.