Immersed in Time (closed)

{ immersed in time } 2

oh. my. god.

your brain courses through the events in your dream, not wanting to lose them.

Dan's smile. Dan's lips. Dan. Dan. DAN.
you almost open your eyes but you don't want to lose the essence of the dream by looking back into your normal, boring bedroom at home, so you don't.

instead, you focus on all of the details from what you remember. the sterile doctor's room. Dan almost kissing you. Phil walking in on it...? you don't understand. maybe watching some more Dan and Phil on the Internet may help. you decide to open your eyes.

boom. a doctor's room surrounds you. the same one from your dream.

your body screams in excitement and you let out a gasp of air. maybe it wasn't a dream after all.

Dan walks in.

"hello y/n." he greets as if this is any normal day.

"Dan?" your throat is yet again parched and dry. just like the dream.

"yep. how about some tea or water?" he asks you. you can't stop staring at his eyes. the beautiful color reminds you of chocolate.

"chocolate? okay, I think we have some." he says as he walks out into the hallway.

dang, you accidentally thought out loud.

he returns with a bar of chocolate and some hot water. he smiles as he puts it on a tray next to you. you gladly take some of the water and gulp it down even though it's scorching.

"how long was I out?" you wonder aloud.

"two weeks. the explosion was pretty crazy. a lot of screaming girls. 3 were too close to the bomb. 2 died from the fumes polluting their oxygen. 5 of you survived, but the other 4 died of post-traumatic stress. you're the only one left." he says sadly. you could see a small tear start to form in his eyes before he swipes it away and sucks in a quick breath.

you exhale sharply, which kinda hurts. 9 people dead. how was it fair that you survived? the other girls with you had a family to go home to. a house to return to. a bed to sleep in.

how was it fair that you got to return to a normal life while they couldn't?

you start breaking down crying. they all didn't get the life they deserved. they could've done something great! been the next astronaut. been the next Einstein. invented something great. they could've been someone in the world.

and here you are. the only one left of them. an ordinary person with no extraordinary talent or any big family name. just one in billions.

you sob. what could you have done to stop it?

thinking about it makes it hurt more, and Dan pats your back awkwardly as he softly says nice things in your ear.

"it wasn't your fault, y/n. it was no one's fault. you couldn't have stopped it. it's okay. don't break yourself down, you didn't do anything wrong." he says. but you don't hear him. you push him away and wallow in your self pity alone.

~

Dan returns later with some maltesers and hot chocolate. he sets them down on a nightstand next to you. you ignore him best you can, even when he stares straight into your eyes, begging for you to speak. you suddenly realize this is all real. you can't do anything the change the past, but you can do everything in your power to shape the future. the past doesn't define you, it strengthens you.

you feel a surge of energy forming in the center of your heart. you may not be able to fix what happened, but you can do anything to live up to their names. Dan notices you perking up. he perks up also.

"feeling better?" he asks hopefully.

"yes." you reply. your voice is no longer scratchy. it sounds confident, strong.

"good." he smiles.

but the smile wears off as you ask him the next question.

"why are you so interested in me?"

he's taken aback.

"I– well, I mean... it's sort of hard to explain. maybe I'll tell you later?" he stutters awkwardly.

"of course." you try to make your voice sound less irritated than it actually was.

he gives a wary smile and walks out of the room.