We Meet The Return Of Silence

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IDINA'S BEDROOM

I hold the blade to my arm. I can't believe she's brought me this far. She makes me want to bleed. She makes me want to die. And I can't get her outta my head.

Beep. My phone goes off again. I grab it and throw it into the bathtub across from the sink I stand at. I look back in the mirror at myself. Maybe I am all that she says. I'm shaking, razor pressed against my skin, just barely. Tearing up, I shift it off my flesh, letting my hand go limp flicking the blade aimlessly. It goes down the drain... like my soul is to her.

THE NEXT DAY

I pull my hoodie up a little and attempt to sink down in my desk as class begins. Maybe today will be the day I truly am one of the many things she calls me: invisible.

"The Berlin Wall," Matthews says as he writes the words on the board, underlining them, "Anybody?"

"The Boring Wall!" Maya shouts back at him, causing an eye roll response.

"The Berlin Wall was built in 1961 by East Berlin, who were communists. Not everyone in East Berlin agreed with this, so most were attempting to flee to West Berlin."

"So, the wall was built to keep in not keep people out?" Maya asks.

"Correct," Matthews replies.

"It split an entire city down the middle," Lucas says, "torn apart at the seams."

"It separated families, friends, and so much more," Riley says looking at the group, "I know I'd be devastated if I couldn't see Maya, Lucas, Farkle, Idina, or Zay every day."

"Being able to see the ones you love wasn't always the problem in Berlin," Farkle says, "It was being able to see people impoverished, stranded with nothing and no one to help them, just abandoned. But, all the people in West Berlin could do is watch and pity the people of the East."

"It came down in 1989, and Berlin finally became the united front they once were and are today," Zay finishes, "People literally tore it down brick by brick, piece by piece."

"Nothing and no one can keep loved ones apart," Cory says, "What lesson does this relate to that I've taught you this year?" He looks at me, I assume wanting me to answer. I subtly shake my head no to him, and he wears a look of confusion for a split second, before beginning to look around the rest of the room for an answer.

"Friendship," Riley says with a smile.

"And growth," Lucas adds.

"Nothing can hold your friends back from trying to help you when you really need them," Cory says, "Whether you want their help or not, they will always find a way," he walks to my desk, tapping on the tip of it, "Care to comment, Idina?" I simply look down at my desk, letting my fingernail draw through the crevices and cracks of the table.

"Idina?" Riley asks, I can sense a hint of worry within her tone. The bell rings after a minute of silence. I am one of the first ones to leave, headed straight for my locker. Of course, it's right next to my friends.

"Hey-" Farkle starts coming next to me, barely touching my arm, but I quickly thrash it out of reach. As the gang starts to come closer to me I quickly make a break for it.

I can't tell them, they wouldn't understand why I'm like this. They may care, but they can't fix it. If I can't fix it how can I expect them to? 

I've looked at it from every possible angle and only have one answer. I've hoped it wouldn't come to this, but I guess some things must happen for a reason. I'm the problem, I'm the scandal, I'm the one who needs to be fixed. If I stay away then they won't get hurt, so there's no other solution.

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