One Direction Awesomeness, Preferences And Sickfics

Am I not noticeable??

Every night I cry myself to sleep.

Every day I want to kill myself.

Because they don't notice me.

They say that they will try to visit every fan.

But it is not on their minds 24/7.

All they ever think about is getting girlfriends, hanging out, and singing their hearts out.

I used to believe that rubbish but now I don't.

Because I wouldn't be sitting here typing this on my computer.

Hoping that day will come.

Where Harry and I are dating.

Where Me and Niall are sharing Nandos together.

Where me and Louis are pranking each other.

Where me and Liam lecture the boys.

Where Zayn and I become best friends.

But that will never happen.

I didn't go to any of their concerts, cause I couldn't afford it.

But I bought some of their merchandise.

And I hung the posters on my wall.

And every night, before I got to bed, I say goodnight to them.

Hoping they would say goodnight back.

But they don't.

When I try to end my life.

Niall's voice rings in my head.

"No Aliya don't do it"

So I stop.

The boys saved my life.

But I'm afraid.

That my life turns worse.

Day after day.

Night after night.

I keep wishing empty thoughts.

That even god can't grant me.

In my eyes, I imagine the boys smiling at me.

Wishing me good luck every school morning.

I imagine us singing together in perfect harmony.

And partying hard on the weekends.

But when I realize that they don't know I'm alive.

I wish that I could die.

I've shed too many tears in my pillow.

To go unnoticed.

Every day, People make fun of me.

They make my life Hell.

They would say, "STUPID WHORE THEY WILL NEVER NOTICE YOU!"

"Why would they love a stupid girl who has  got a disability or two?!"

"THEY WOULD NEVER NOTICE A POOR SLUT LIKE YOU!"

They are right.......

Harry Styles

Liam Payne

Louis Tomlinson

Niall Horan 

And

Zayn Malik

Will never notice me.

Because I'm not noticeable.

I'm just another fan in the crowd.

Who is unnoticeable...........................

And worthless.