Blaze

Cry

~_____~

The bright sun filtered against her face when she opened her eyes. The shouts in the distance had now disappeared, but she could still hear the laughing of children from afar. A wave of fresh wind swept over her shaking the branches of the tree above her. They sounded almost like rattles shaking, but with a breathless murmur.

Sitting up Namjoo stared at the blanket she was lying on.

Just once she wanted to do something alone without anyone intruding on her, so she'd decided to leave home. Namjoo thought she made the right decision after all. This was calming and it soothed her tense nerves. Plus, she didn't have to think about anything at all.

Lying back down she sought for the clear ablue sky above and blocked the sun out from her eyes with her hand. She often came to this park with Kyungsoo just to sit around and play games or eat. Those were her good days. Now she didn't know where those days were. As time continued to pass by at the blink of an eye, all Namjoo could really feel was stress.

Today she was by herself, unusually. Kyungsoo would be upset if he knew she hadn't called him out for their game hour on her day off. There was no plan to tell him about this day off. There was no plan to tell anyone where she was.

Today's alone was different from all the other days of being alone. Today's alone was called for.

Easing her arm over her eyes she decided she wanted to nap some more. Without luck she awoke minutes later feeling hungry. Refusing to meet her needs she continue to lie there waiting for time to continue going by as if she might see the second hand of time waving at her. The moment her head started spinning she got up, grabbed her things, and left.

Upon stopping by a convenience store to buy a sandwich she came across some bouquets on sale. Her eyes dropped upon the yellow daisies and fresh leaves smelling of clean water. Finally picking it out of the bucket she checked out only to, instants later, be walking down a very luscious green area she hadn't been to in three years.

There was no one there, not a soul in sight nor any other visitor. Namjoo had this cemetery all to herself.

The grass prickled against her shoes as she walked by and came back to life after she moved on to continue waving in the wind. Her father's mound had been cleared of the weeds growing on it and some food had been placed beside the tombstone. As expected, her mother had most likely been the last visitor. When her eyes landed on the cold rice, the boiled pork, and the boiled egg she recalled Suho telling her to go home to visit Junho.

Yes, she should make time, she thought. Then on the other hand, she didn't have time. Home wasn't her place anymore.

Setting the bouqet down beside the food wrapped safely inside aluminum foil Namjoo pulled out a bottle of soju she'd bought along the way with her.

"I'm sorry," Namjoo apologized, "I can't drink with you right now."

Silence greeted her back, but it wasn't something that was foreign to her. Namjoo knew silence well. Her hair fluttered against her face before the cool wind died down and she sat there for a while, staring at the mound; empty thoughts wafting through her mind. Finally getting up she walked away.

~_____~

"The movie was so good, wasn't it!?" Suho asked again 10 minutes later.

They'd walked down the district in order to look for some place to grab lunch. Suho was only thinking of the movie they'd seen, but so many other things were on Chorong's mind. Partly, she was glad Suho enjoyed the movie. He really loved the cinema just as Namjoo had promised, but now she was on her own...with him.