Figure you out

.3 .

Once Lucy had calmed down, Luke stood and carried her to the living room, setting her on the couch.

"Please don't do that again." Lucy  mumbled, her voice broken. She couldn't handle it again. She didn't want to cry again.

Luke nodded gently but remained silent. He went into the kitchen and picked up another cigarette, ignoring the girl once more. As much as he loved the feeling of caring, he couldn't. She'd hurt him. He'd hurt her.

Lucy sighed in frustration. Why couldn't he just choose? Why did he have to confuse her so much? Why did he have to act like she was just a burden to bear, then like she was actually someone important? She'd prefer he'd just kick her out onto the street. It'd hurt less.

Maybe she'd just have to kick herself out. She wanted to be with him, but not like this.

Lucy stood from the couch, and walked to the door.

Luke turned.

"What are you doing?" He spoke quickly, panicked. No. She couldn't leave him. He knew she would eventually, but not yet. He didn't want to let her leave him yet.

"Leaving." She knew she was being unreasonable and would regret leaving within two minutes, she wasn't even dressed nearly well enough to go out in public. But she didn't care. She wasn't in her right mind. She wanted to leave. She didn't want to have to put up with his bipolar behavior.

She opened the door but soon found it closed in her face.

The next second she was pinned against it with Luke hovering over her face, his breath smelling like cigarettes and vanilla.

It was an unusual but addictive smell. Everything about him was addictive. But all addictions were bad, and needed to be broken, or they'd hurt you.

"I'm sorry. Please don't. Don't leave." He pleaded. His voice cracked as he spoke and his eyes turned a lighter shade of blue. He wanted her. He needed her.

Lucy couldn't help but think he looked like a broken, lost little boy, who had just been kicked in the gut, and was pleading for mercy, for love.

She was so conflicted. He cared. He cared now. But once she agreed to stay, he wouldn't anymore.

"You don't care. You don't care about me and you don't care if I leave."

Luke was getting frustrated. He had just comforted her as she cried, how could she think he didn't care? Even if he had been a huge ass to her. He cared. He cared too much. That's why he was acting the way he was.

"I do."

"Well I don't! I don't care! You were right. I don't care!" Lukes jaw clenched, glancing over her face.  "Is that what you want to hear Luke?!"

"Of course you don't. But don't leave, okay?" Her agreeing wasn't the best feeling, but it didn't matter.

"Of course I do you idiot. I've cared since you saved me! But you just can't seem to believe me! And- and you act like you care, sometimes, and then I'm just a ball and chain tied around you're ankle! Pick one Luke! Choose! Because you're just hurting me! You're making me doubt myself! You're hurting me more than my mother did when she screamed at me that I was nothing! At least she didn't pretend she cared, then turn around and hate me again like you! I'm so confused Luke! Just choose! Please?!" Lucy begged.

"Don't leave. Please don't leave. And please don't let me hurt you. Don't care."

"I can't just not care." She sighed.