For The Love Of Niall: Niam

Chapter 20: Meant To Be

                    Cinnamon-sprinkled, crumb cake and a warm cup of tea set aside upon the table; the remote nearby. The static sounds of bad reception radiated from the television set, as the announcer called the winning baseball team. The crowd cheered and caused an uproar, a stadium full of dedicated people simply enjoying themselves; simply enjoying what they deemed as a glorious moment in life. Their favorite team had one. They got everything they wanted. A pale, and slightly hairy, hand grabbed the remote, immediately growing tiresome of the celebration already. There wasn't much for him to celebrate, trapped in a hotel room alone, starving with no desire to eat anything, and a broken heart. Liam had been in such a gloomy state and the stubble's on his cheeks and chin and the fact that the rim of his eyes were red only reminded him of that every time he looked in the mirror. He felt as though he deserved it though, to sit there and drown in his misery, wondering where the love of his life was spending all his nights and days and it pained Liam even more to know that it wasn't with him. Maybe that's how Niall felt for the month, or so, that Liam had been gone - trapped in his dangerous mind, no interest in anything. The countless amount of voice-mails he left on the blond's phone only became mocking messages of how desperate Liam sounded and he didn't feel any better knowing that his texts weren't even being read, indicated by the option on Niall's phone that allowed him to see that.

                    Liam thought he had it all figured out; thought he could beg and plead for Niall to drop whatever was going on in his life and run off to New York with the same guy who left him in turmoil. Boy was he wrong. He heard the hesitation in Niall's voice, as he waited on the other end of the line, hoping the blond would give him the answer he had hoped for; however, his offer was turned out. He was left confused, to say the least. Niall never said 'yes' or 'no.' He just simply said he needed time for himself, and then ended the call with a farewell; and suppose Liam was selfish for thinking he was going to get much more than that. But that's what love did to him - made him believe in the inevitable and the possible, made him believe that he and Niall were meant to be. He was starting to see how wrong he was, how wrong he was to go and assure Niall that it was okay for him to open his heart to him and he only crushed it. Liam wanted nothing more than to take the first flight back to London, stand on Niall's doorsteps and plead until his voice went dry and hoarse. He owed his lover that much and more. Was an apology going to be enough? He had said that already; he thought his voice was convincing and sincere, but Niall's mind was trapped in the thought of Liam leaving him again, going against the brunette's wishes to return to him.

                    Their relationship went through a treacherous slope and he had so much confidence in believing that they had fought the odds for a reason - that they would be together in the end. Maybe Liam was counting himself out too late, but Niall had showed no signs of running back to him, even if he really wanted to. Liam wondered how the blond had changed, physically and mentally. He wondered if he still laughed the same and if anyone else was making him smile. He wondered if he still had the blond tips with the careless, and partying, attitude to match. He wondered if Niall still played the guitar, his hands gently guiding the pick across the strings, creating a melodic sound that could only put you through a beautiful slumber; and, most of all, he wonder if Niall still was in love with him. Liam painfully chuckled, as his head fell back against the couch's cushions, genuinely upset by it all. His chest ached when he laughed or coughed, his head ached if he moved it too swiftly, and his legs had fell asleep more times than he could keep up with. He stayed in his hotel room, hidden from the outside world. The most sunlight he got was through the drapes of his windows and those moments didn't even last long, only for him to shut the drapes tightly. Staying within a beautiful city and not once finding that moment of happiness. It was going to take more than late-night, city lights and pubs full of alcohol to make him better.