Aurore

15- It's Time

I wiped the sweat off my hands onto my jeans for the third time in the past five minutes. I drew a shaky breath.
"Hey! Jason!"
I turned and saw a boy with blonde hair and blue eyes walking towards me and instantly grinned.
"Max."
He offered his hand. I shook it strongly.
"I haven't seen you in a long time. I thought you were-"
"Dead?" I asked.
He nodded. I shrugged.
"So what'd you need? That no one could be around for?"
"Well," I began as I leaned towards him and lowered my voice, "I need some...help..."
"With what?"
"Confidential?" I assured.
"Confidential."
"Okay. I know you're not a fan of the Agensie..."
He leaned forward in interest.
~
"Kyle? How are you doing on the supplies?"
The phone beeped, signaling another caller. I ignored it.
"Good. I have 4 sources. I want at least 6. Once we leave, the community of suppliers will only grow. And your informationals?"
"I have 3. But they all think they have someone willing to do it."
"Good. Now-"
I hear a yell from the other line.
"Kyle?" I asked.
"You're under arrest." I heard.
"What?" Kyle asked.
"For treason."
Then, a gunshot and the sound of the phone hitting the floor.
"Kyle!" I screamed.
"Jason!"
I opened my eyes to see Kyle.
I breathed out in relief.
"Another dream?" He asked. I nodded. "Why'd you scream my name?"
"They...they killed you." I stuttered.
"That won't happen. Just relax."
"Right. Of course. This is too well planned. We've spent too much time on this. There's no way they'll catch us."
"Exactly. Now go back to sleep."
I nodded and laid back down.
"Things will be fine." He said as he fell asleep.
~
But things weren't fine. As time went on, I had more and more nightmares and my anxiety rose. The closer we came to our date of leaving, the more anxiety attacks I had.
~
I walked down the hallway to the training facility to get some extra nerves out. The next day was the day, and I couldn't stop shaking.
"Jason!" I heard Shasta's voice; I knew it anywhere. But I didn't turn around. Instead I continued walking and pretended not to hear her.
"Jason!" This time she was too loud for me not to hear her. I sighed and turned.
"Shasta." I said coldly.
"Jason. I have a question."
I nodded absentmindedly.
"You haven't been yourself during training. I mean, since we are the same rank now. I've seen you. You're planning something, aren't you? You're spending so much time with Kyle, being all secretive. And Ryan, too. I asked him, but he acted like he didn't know what I was talking about. What's going on?"
"Nothing you need to be concerned about." I smirked.
"Jason. Is it something serious?"
I shrugged. "I dunno."
"Jason...you're not trying to..." Her eyes widened.
I instantly feared she knew. I had to come up with something- and quick.
"Yes!" I exclaimed. "I'm tired of my life. I'm worthless, nothing. Why continue on and be a nuisance to the world?"
"Jason, no-" She began, but I cut her off.
"No, Shasta. You don't understand. I'm a worthless piece of crap. First, Sabrina betrayed me, then you and I... no. no way. I'm done."
I turned and walked away from her as I strived to withhold my smile.
"Jason you can't!" She said as she grabbed my arm. I shook it off and continued walking.
I heard her crumple to the ground, crying. I hated to hear her crying. She deserves it. I told myself. But deep down inside, I knew she didn't.
I trained for about three hours until I felt I couldn't do any more. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and grabbed a towel as I left. The sound of Shasta's crying still rung in my head. I was filled with guilt, but it had to be done. I couldn't tell anyone about our plans. We were too close to putting it into operation. I sighed and went back to my and Kyle's room, where Kyle lay on the floor, having fallen asleep from looking through the plans all night.
I quietly gathered up the papers in front of him, rolled them up, and placed them in our secret hiding spot that changed almost every day. That day, it was on the ceiling in the shower.
I got in the shower and enjoyed the warm water hitting my face. It was refreshing, and I knew it would be the last shower I'd get before leaving the Agensie. I faced upward, my eyes closed and my hands pressed against the wall for support, as the water hit me in the face. I had so many memories in the Agensie. Even the shower. I'd had many attacks where I 'd tried to snap myself out of it in the shower. Everything I'd ever known was there...
"Jason! Jason!" Kyle's frantic shouts pulled me from my inner thoughts.
I stuck my head out of the shower.
"What's wrong?"
He rushed into the small bathroom.
"Jason, the plans, they're gone! I was studying them, and I fell asleep and-" I flicked water that was on my hands at his face.
"Calm down. I didn't want someone to walk in and see them, so I put them back in their spot."
His body slumped in relief.
"Oh. Good. Thank you, Jason." I nodded.
He wiped the water from his face and left the room.
I couldn't return to the state I was in before, so I hurried as I finished my shower. I glanced at my waterproof watch.
6:38.
Just a few more hours.
Just a few more hours until my life changed.