Giving Fantasia: The Taking Fantasia Sequel

Chapter 111: Eating, Drinking, and Doofing

Chapter 111: Eating, Drinking, and Doofing

The Viking 'makeover' was a nightmare and Wendy was NOT exaggerating. She was a shadow worker – she knew a nightmare when she saw it – and THAT had ABSOLUTELY been a NIGHTMARE!

For one: Vikings had zero conception of modesty. They threw on, threw off, poked here, poked there, pushed, shoved, buckled, unbuckled, laced, unlaced, zipped, unzipped, loosened, tightened, and tightened some more. By the time they were finished, Wendy felt indecent.

For another: Vikings had zero conception of vanity. Viking fashion consisted of four textiles: leather, fur, camo, and chain mail. Viking footwear was singular: boots. Everyone wore big, clunky, ridiculously oversized boots.

Wendy was no exception. Her outfit was horrendous, and her temper was dressed for the part. Ruffnutt had forced her into a bearskin leather smock that Wendy couldn't decide was grey, green, black, or brown until Ruffnutt suggested it was the color of 'poor digestion.'

Lovely.

It got worse.

The smock came with accessories – a furry waistband and iron plated belt. The furry waistband was grungy (Wendy was sure there were insets living in the lining); and the iron belt was too long. Astrid solved the problem by crisscrossing the leftover belt into an "X" across her chest. Wendy felt constricted, but apparently the iron plates would shield her against stab wounds to the heart.

Lovely again.

And it got even worse.

Astrid and Ruffnutt were too tall, so Wendy was wearing 'child size leggings.' The leggings stopped at her shins, but those were covered with cloth and string. As Astrid and Ruffnutt wrapped, Wendy noticed that the Vikings wore lots of layers – most of which seemed unnecessary. So Wendy voiced her opinion. Astrid told her to shut up – Gothi poked Wendy with her staff – and Ruffnutt said "Well hair ribbons are unnecessary too!"

Lovely times three.

Then came the worst of all.

Ruffnutt wanted to burn her hair ribbon. Wendy vehemently refused.

"Fine." Ruffnutt handed Wendy massive combat boots. "But it makes you look like a wimp. Second only to Hiccup. But you're pretty close. Ya know..."

Ruffnutt pleasantly gestured. "Especially with that flouncy hair. And flouncy accent. And flouncy flounce. Oh yeah – I agree with Astrid."

Ruffnutt bore her teeth as Astrid smirked. "You've got a serious wimp problem."

Well. 

By the end of the 'fashion show' Wendy was more than a little vexed.

"Wimp problem. Well someone sat on her own axe..."

Wendy grumbled behind crossed arms. Astrid and Ruffnutt had 'ordered' her to follow Gothi to an undisclosed location, which added to Wendy's vexation.

"Probably another prison." Wendy muttered, descending a deep stairwell. Again she was irritated – like everything else in Berk, the stairs were just a hair too big, but enough to make the journey challenging. She had to jump and hike to keep pace.

Stomping down the last step, Wendy entered a stone hall. She paused. The hall was high as the sky and adorned with silver stained glass. Statues of Viking chiefs guarded the entrance; swords, axes, and spears clasped firmly beneath their bearded chins.