She Woke

Smell Of Smoke

“I ran.” Samuel told her simply. “I left your car one town over, so it would be easy for them to get it back to you. Then I got on a bus. I didn't even know where it was going, but I figured that was for the best. I ended up in Colorado. I thought it would be impossible for them to follow me there.

After about a week in a dirty motel that I knew I wouldn't be able to pay the bill for, I started feeling like I was being watched. Maybe I was paranoid from the cocaine I had been making deals to get from a dirty looking dealer, or maybe it was real, but I didn't feel safe. I checked myself into rehab clinic just to get myself out of danger. I was there for 8 hours, and somehow a room down the hall was on fire. The fire spread more quickly than it should have in a place like that. Before I knew what was happening, it was outside my door. It spread around my room like the walls were coated in gasoline. I sniffed the air. I could only smell the fire. I hadn't smelled gasoline when I entered the room, but the air had smelled sweet. I had attributed it to an air freshener, but it could have been an accelerant.

I ran to the window, but it was locked. Of course, I was in a rehab center. They wouldn't leave the windows open. I picked up a chair and tried to smash through the glass, but they must have used some polycarbonate windows or something, because I couldn't get them to break. I realized that my only way out was through the fire.”

Samuel paused, and shifted from one foot to the other. This part of the story was more painful to tell than he thought it would be. He looked at Natalie, and what he could see of her face was a mix of horror and grim anticipation. He continued, “They always told us in school to crawl through a fire because of the smoke, so I started out that way. I breathed as much of the less contaminated air near the floor as I could, but I wasn't about to crawl through flames. I sucked in air, held my breath, stood up, and lept through the doorway. The heat was unbearable. My pants were on fire, but I didn't have the time or space to stop, drop, and roll. I made it to the emergency exit before I fell to the ground. I tried to roll, but I didn't have the strength. I was in so much pain. I was flat on my back with my eyes closed, everything was so hot. When I opened my eyes, the world was glowing orange and yellow, and a figure appeared above me. It was The Chief. My paranoia had been real, it had been justified. He must have had me followed more closely than I had realized. My lips parted the slightest bit in realization.

I lowered my eyes and saw that there was a revolver in his hand, pointed at my head. A menacing smirk appeared on his square face.

'you stole from me, Sammy.' he told me, 'you stole from me, and you shot someone I enjoyed very much. You murdered him in cold blood, and you ran like a fucking coward. I shoulda had my boys cut up that pretty girlfriend of yours, but I showed her mercy. You, Sammy? You don't deserve my mercy. You're lucky it was a new guard you shot, because if it had been anyone I cared about much more, I would have killed that girl-what's her name? Natalie? I would have tortured her and made you watch.'

The fire felt hotter and closer to my skin, but The Chief kept talking, 'I am going to be kinder than I have ever been, and I'm only going to kill you today, Sammy. It would be a shame to have to kill that sweet red haired beauty. You really should be thanking me.'

Suddenly my vision was black and my ears were ringing. The Chief had shot me. Why couldn't I see? Why could I hear that high pitched drone? Why wasn't I in pain? I should have been dead. I should have at least been in intense pain. My mind raced until it went quiet and I didn't think anything at all anymore.”

Natalie's mouth hung open. She closed it. She didn't want Samuel to know how much his story horrified her. He had been in a fire. He had been on fire. He had killed another person. It was not the Samuel she loved in this story. It was a completely different person. She hoped she was talking to the man she remembered, the stranger who had bought her a drink so many years ago. His story was heartbreaking and terrifying, but she needed to know the rest of it. “what happened? How did you get here?” she asked him.

“I woke up in a hospital bed in Delaware three days ago. The doctors had told the police I would likely never wake up, and that I was a rehab patient. The cops somehow put together that I must have been involved with the people behind the fire, and that I was probably in trouble and knew something I wasn't supposed to know. They moved me from Colorado to Delaware and it was decided that if I did wake up, I would have to tell them everything I knew and what happened, and they would decide whether to put me in witness protection. Apparently there was footage of The Chief from the parking lot cameras, and he's wanted on a national level. When I woke up I told the FBI everything I knew about him, and they told me they would put me in witness protection.

The first thing I asked them was if I could see you again, if I could at least say goodbye to you. They told me no, and that they had already told you I was dead. I felt like I'd been dead for years, and when they told me that, I died again. I began to make my plans to escape the hospital immediately. I knew they wouldn't let me out of their sight, I had to testify, I was too valuable. So that night I waited until the guards outside my doors were switching shifts. I did the high school pillows under the blanket to look like my body, I dressed, and I walked out looking as normal as I possibly could.

Luckily, there was a gas station across the street from the hospital, because I hadn't looked in a mirror since I woke up. When I saw my face, I didn't recognize myself. I just started to cry. Why would they need to put me in any sort of protective custody when I look like this?”

Samuel had made his way to her bedside table while he was talking, and after finishing the last sentence, he clicked the lamp on. Natalie gasped in spite of herself. He was unrecognizable. His face had been burned so badly the skin had bubbled up. It looked almost as though someone had smeared elmer's glue over his face in layers, and let it dry. The texture was uneven and rippled. He had no eyebrows, but his hair had grown in the months since he'd shaved his head in her bathroom, and it was long enough to cover his eyes. She felt physical pain from his stare, as if it were literally piercing her. The skin on his hands looked the same as his face.

“my whole body.” Samuel whispered, he knew she was wondering how much of his skin looked that way. His put his head down and turned the lamp off. “I only came to let you know what happened to me, and to say goodbye. I'm going to go to the police after this and tell them who I am.”

Natalie reached out to the lamp. Samuel's hand was still on the switch. She caressed his rough, rippled skin gently, and turned his hand to click the lamp back on.

“Sit.” It was somewhere between a request and a command, and Samuel abided. “what makes you think I am at all put off by your appearance? Your skin is only skin. Your body is only a body. Samuel, I have been in love with you since I let you buy me dinner in that little diner, and I didn't fall for your skin, your hair, or your body. I fell in love with your soul. That's why I could never let go. I could never give you up or get over you. I knew your soul, and you knew mine...I could never give myself to another so fully.” a tear slid down Natalie's cheek, “I know you have to go, and you need to be in protective custody. Thank you for coming to say goodbye to me. I love you with everything I am, Samuel. No matter what. I just wish I could come with you.”

Samuel took Natalie's soft hands in his own. She was the love of his life. The perfect woman, and he had mistreated her so much. He hated himself for what he had done to this woman. He hated himself for what he was about to put her through, again. He couldn't help smiling, however. Despite what he had done, despite his new appearance, this beautiful woman loved him. Someone loved him. He was worth something.

“Come with me.” he said. Natalie's expression went from upset to confused. Could she? Should she? Why not? She had no family, nothing to keep her in that big empty house. This was Samuel, she knew she would do anything for him, and she decided to go with him. The confused look turned into a smile, beaming, brilliant, and she answered him.

“okay.”