Accidental Love

1. The Basics.

When I was young, my eyes were always filled with beautiful happiness, but now that I am older, you can see that all of the happiness has drained and how empty everything has become.// Unknown.
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Imagine if heaven had visiting hours. Close your eyes for a minute and really imagine it. It would make everything a little bit easier, People wouldn't be so sad, people would love life and some would not blame the death of their family member on themselves. Take me for instance, here I am blaming my mother's death on myself.

My mother died in a car accident three months ago. I remember every part that happened. I was in the front seat with her. We were heading back to Seattle. We were coming back from visiting my grandparents in California. Things were good, vibes were good, everything went well, until a semi truck comes and crashes in to our car. I blacked out almost immediately.

Before I knew it, I woke up and the first thing I heard was 'your mother is dead'. I thought they were kidding, but when I saw my grandparents come in, I lost it. Right then and there, I didn't know what to do. I was alone. I know I have my 'dad', Anthony, but he is nothing to me.

He cheated on my mom for two years straight, mom never really knew. I found this out at mom's funeral when Anthony presented his new fiancee, Emily to the family. Grandpa did not want me living with that type of man, but when grandpa tried to fight for my custody, Anthony said something that made them back off immediately. I tried to think of what it was, but no one dared to say a word.

I feel my eyes watering. I push those thoughts out of my mind and head to the kitchen, where Dakota, our maid, is serving all types of snacks for this party Anthony is having later to celebrate his engagement. Dakota is like a second mom to me. She has helped me through everything that has came my way and I'm so very grateful for that.

Anthony knows Dakota is like my little helper with my problems, but that doesn't stop him from sending me to Support groups, where other people talk about their problems, life, all sorts of stuff. He doesn't do it to help me, he just does it to get me out of the house. So right after school, I go to the support group. If I don't go, he'll get a call, which will get me in a big trouble because he usually thinks I'm doing drugs.

Anthony says that is wasting his time because he has business to deal with back at the company he owns. Other than that, Anthony and Emily spend their time making me feel worse than I already do. My depression has been getting out of hand these months and it's mostly because of them. They never miss to tell me how ugly I am, how fat I am, when in reality, I'm the perfect weight, how ungrateful or how I'm a waste of space, but I have chosen to believe them. That's why I barely eat anything now.

This all started when mom left.

God, why can't I get this out of my mind?

"Alex, honey," Dakota's voice is so soft and soothing, that is the only thing that puts me at ease these days. "Have you gotten any sleep? You look tired."