Unraveled

Chapter 10

10 Days Until...

Brooke

Dear Mom, Dad, and Josh,

I'm sorry but this had to happen.  I can't live like this anymore.  In this constantly depressed state it is pretty much impossible to even get out of bed to eat or go to the bathroom.  Believe me, this is the best thing for me right now.  I can't keep living.  Mom and Dad I am so sorry.  But it just seems like neither of you give a shit about me or anything I do.  I don't know if that is on purpose or by accident, but either way it hurts a lot.  And it has affected me more than you know.  But that is not the only reason why I am doing this.  Things at school are rough as I am sure you are aware.  And that is mainly why.  This next part is for Josh so please leave it to him to read by himself.

Josh, baby I love you.  I really do.  I know you don't believe it since I was an idiot and cheated on you.  But I did it so you would hurt less when I kill myself.  That's why.  And I am so sorry for this.  I know you already lost one person that you loved.  And I am sorry but I can't keep going like this.  You've seen my scars.  You know how much I'm hurting.  But if you really cared, you would have told someone.  Not kept it to yourself and try to help that way.  Because yeah, it helped for a while but it doesn't anymore.  And I know I should go get some help for myself but at this point I don't think anything would really help very much.  Which is why I am resorting to suicide.  It is the only hope I have.  And just please understand.  Thank you and I love you.

Love,

Brooke Gosaka

Hopefully that will suffice and they will be okay with that as a goodbye letter.  If they ask any more questions or have any more questions they can ask either Josh or Ashlee.  They will both be able to answer pretty damn well.  Unless Ashlee decides she wants to keep that secret a secret forever.  Then it won't be fully understood. 

And I still cannot believe that Josh and his friends got arrested last night.  Like what the hell were they even doing going clubbing?  And fake I.D.'s?  Well at least I know that Josh has moved on, at least according to his messed up hair and clothes he had on.  Because he and his friends all looked like they had hooked up with chicks.  Guys are just something else, and it hurts, I feel like he doesn't care anymore.  Either that or he was just trying to get the fuck over me.  Which would be completely understandable honestly because I hurt him... And that probably made him think I didn't give a shit about him like it was supposed to.  Well, at least I know that it worked.  At least there is that.

3 Days Until...

Josh

"Are you ready to go to the funeral bro?" Tony stands in the doorway, leaning against the frame. "Not really, but there isn't any way around it and it's one of my last days here." He smiles slightly at me. "It'll be okay Josh, I know things have been rough lately. Everything happens for a reason though right? You'll get through this. And about Brooke? I think you should try and get back together with her. The way you looked at her and spoke to her in the car... It was nothing like it was with Ariel. You two connect on a greater basis and that kind of bond can't just be thrown away." He finishes his speech and waits for my response. "Tony, I was thinking about it. And then every time I'm close to forgiving her, I see her pressed up against the wall with that guy."

"I know. But we can talk about this later. We have another important person in your life to help right now." We walk out of the room to the porch where everyone has been waiting for us. "You ready to go honey?" My mom asks, bringing me into a hug. "Yeah Mom, I'm ready as I'll ever be." With that, I climb into the car and we leave for the church.

"Thank you so much for coming Josh." Ariel's dad hugs me tight. "It's no problem at all sir. I am so sorry for your losses lately." Chris, her dad, used to be happy and jolly with no wrinkles whatsoever. The stress recently has taken the toll on him though. He has wrinkles under his eyes, which have sunken into his face, and he's become much thinner and has a very depressed feeling surrounding him. "Thank you Josh, I'm sorry about all this stress you've been under with everything that's happened in the last few months too."

"Don't be sir, it isn't your fault. It's just the way that life happens."

After the funeral, we all gathered at his house for a sort of remembrance thing. There was a Power point of things that happened in her life. All her favorite foods, and music. It all kind of made me wish I had never left here to begin with.