Edge of the Ravine

19

Chapter Nineteen

A strange paranoia enveloped me all morning.  As I prepared for school, I found myself constantly looking over my shoulder or searching the shadows.  It was as if I was subconsciously expecting him to jump out of a dark corner at me and announce that the whole dream was really just a nightmare.  I wanted him to do that, just so I would have the reassurance of him being at my side and force away my worries.  But it didn't happen and I quickly left the shack behind as I made my way across the valley. It was as if a demon was running his fingers down my spine all the way across the valley.

Hugging my jacket tighter around my body, I quickened my pace.  An early morning breeze swirled around me.  Absently, I thought it might have been an unwise decision to wear just a jacket, even though the radio predicted decent temperatures later in the morning.  As if in a mood to race the wind itself, I hurried even more.  Finally, when the anxiety and demon and wind were more than I could deal with, I sought a hasty escape.  Letting loose my long legs, I sprinted for the train tracks with all of the speed that my frightened mind could coax from my panicked body.

I arrived at school just in time to see the police cars pull into the parking lot.

The world began to spin and dark spots danced across my vision as I stumbled my way to the bike rack.  It felt like frostbite had erupted across my palm as I gripped the icy metal.  But I could not let go.  I could not move.  My feet were leaden and my tongue was swollen and to force any amount of movement other than blinking through my tears was an utter impossibility.

No.  No, it can't be, my thoughts whispered in agony. They were dim thoughts, however, because some greater part of my consciousness was enwrapped securely in a numb shock-absorber.  It was this part of my brain that made my fingers uncurl from the metal bar.  Because of this part, I was able to take step after solitary step towards the main doors.  And, if I was honest, it was this part of my brain that fervently prayed that something terrible had happened to someone else.  Anyone else.  Just as long as it wasn't this last person that I loved.  Not him.

The police officers were standing in the lobby area when I walked in.  They were engrossed in deep conversation with three school officials: the principal, the vice principal, and the student counselor.  Each one wore curious, grim expressions on their faces and worry brightened all of their eyes.  Seeing them like this, I couldn't help but feel my bottom lip begin to tremble.

"Oliver," called the counselor when she spotted me.  Mrs. Barnes waved me over hurriedly and I felt as if I'd just walked into a trap.  Yet, that other part of my mind was still in control and so I had no choice but to walk straight into the midsts of this anxious party.

"Yes, Mrs. Barnes?" I asked through an incredibly dry throat.

"Oliver, have you seen Alec Baldwin this morning?"

I could not answer.  As soon as the horrifying words left her lips, my vision went black.  It didn't even register when my legs crumpled beneath me.  It was the one and only time I had ever fainted in my entire life.

The unfamiliar walls of the nurse's office greeted my vision when I awoke only five minutes later.  After blinking in confusion a few times, it only slightly began to sink in what exactly had happened.  When the full realization hit me, I leapt up with a gasp.  Without a single thought to what was going on, I charged out of the room and sprinted through the school, eagerly searching for the nearest exit.  There was only one thing I had to do that was more important than anything else: find Alec!

I escaped the school before the cops even realized I was awake.  Mere minutes later, I'd reached the train tracks.  My lungs were burning and my side was aching by the time my feet settled into their familiar rhythm between the two metal rails.  Slowly, I settled into the endurance pace that Alec had set for us back when he first joined the track team.  It carried me north with less speed than I would have preferred, but dragging myself through the pain would have slowed me down even more.By the time I reached Alec's house, I could barely breathe.  Leaning against a tree for support, I watched with horrified eyes as I counted four police cars parked in front of my second home.  The lights were flashing on one set of cop cars and I knew it to be the vehicle that had been parked at my school.

Having no desire to deal with the cops before I could see this for myself, I quickly scrambled up the hill that the back of the house was built into.  Once I was above the house, I slowly slid down until my sneakers could feel the rough tiles beneath my feet.  Moving quickly across the roof, I held onto the eaves as my butt slid down the hill just far enough for me to brace my foot against Alec's window.  Quickly, as I had done often before, I pushed open the glass barrier and slipped into the familiar bedroom.

Everything was exactly the same.

In the twenty-four hours since last I was in this bedroom, nothing looked a bit out of place.  His bed covers were tossed haphazardly across the mattress.  A half-full glass of water stood on the nightstand.  The alarm clock was facing away from the bed, obviously having been placed there when Alec's vain attempt to shut it up in an acceptable manner ended up with it on the floor.  Clothes were scattered throughout the room, showing no sign of any disturbance other than what a normal teenage boy could cause.  Already, I knew what had happened, but only one thing truly confirmed it.

When I spotted the piece of jewelry placed carefully on his vanity, I let out a half-strangled sob.  Falling to the floor, I sobbed as loudly as could be imagined.  Tears ran in streaks down my face, but I could still see the distinctive shine off the silver ring.  Of course that was all I could see. He placed it so perfectly that I would be able to notice nothing else once my sight caught hold of the ring I'd given him on our one year anniversary.

Footsteps pounded up the stairs of the house and I reached for the only keepsake of my mother, and now my lover, that I ever possessed.  My fist clenched around the white silver band as I brought both fists to my temples.  That was how they found me: with my knees brought up to my chest, my forehead resting upon the hard caps, and my fists protecting my consciousness as much as they were able.

It was over.

He was gone.

Alec had finally done it. He escaped.