The Abuser

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

"You don't find love, it finds you. It's got a little bit to do with destiny, fate, and what's written in the stars."

~ Anais Nin

............

"Haha! There's my beautiful girl!" Fred and George slide into chairs next to mine. "Why aren't you dancing?"

I sigh. "Guess. No one asked me. It's okay though..." I add hastily.

Fred puts his arm comfortingly on my shoulder. "Look, you can still have a good time. I'll snag a dance from you, just as soon as I get free from my own date." He grins and looks over his shoulder. "Coming, dear!" He yells in the direction of the punch table. They scurry off, leaving me alone.

So. Here I am. At the Yule Ball, the event of the year, and I'm alone. Alone. Fighting back an enormous surge of self-pity, I look down at my dress.

It's so beautiful, with a tight strapless bodice and shimmering floaty misty grey skirt. So much more beautiful than my face and body deserve...

I made myself look as lovely as I could; but now I feel that it was a wasted effort. My dark hair hangs in a thick weave down my back and I have a thin band of sparkling diamonds tight around my throat. They match my simple, but elegant, diamond earrings.

I wonder if I'll ever get my jewels back from Malfoy. I think, becoming more depressed every second.

Gazing through the happy whirl of dancing couples, I see Malfoy with his date; Pansy Parkinson. She's wearing a hideously frilly, pink ensemble, but Malfoy doesn't seem to care. He's smiling down at her as he lifts her in the air. With a horrid jolt of recognition, I see the glint of a familiar pair of earrings hanging from Pansy's ears. My pearls! And glittering around her wrist is the silver band that my mother gave me so many years ago.

A wave of cold fury sweeps over me. How DARE Malfoy give MY jewelry to HER?! How dare he?! I feel almost ready to run into the crowd and attack him, but know that it would be useless.

I can't stand to watch the dancers, so I stare back at myself. Pulling back my skirts, I admire my tall heels, such a soft satiny grey. If only I could be dancing in them right now. I can picture myself on the floor, held tight in the loving arms of a boy, dancing as if there wasn't a care in the world. Who am I kidding? What boy would want to dance with a blood-traitor of a potato like me, anyway?

My eyes begin to burn but I can't wipe them for fear of smudging my makeup. In a desperate attempt to distract myself, my gaze ends up on Hermione Granger. I should be happy for my best friend; she got Victor Krum! She looks like royalty tonight.

I will not cry. Fred and George are right; I don't need a boy to make me feel happy! I stand resolutely, only to nearly get trampled by a giggling couple who have strayed away from the main body of dancers.

I can't stand it, so I sit back down, searching for familiar faces in the crowd. I find Malfoy again and as much as I hate myself for the thought, he looks so handsome in his high collared dress-robes. He spins Pansy around again in time to the music and to my surprise, makes eye contact with me from across the room.

He holds it for as long as he can and just as he's beginning to turn, he looks over his shoulder and winks at me.

My stomach drops. Suddenly, clearly, I know what that wink meant. He got me back; he has shown me exactly how serious he was. My mouth falls open a bit and tears flood my eyes, rolling down my burning cheeks.

This is stupid! I'm being a baby; crying about something as insignificant as a ball! I should be ashamed of myself. I mentally beat myself, but it's no use. I feel like my heart's breaking. It was hard enough being alone and on the outside, but the realization that Malfoy knows about this and takes pleasure from it is too much to bear.