Caspar Lee Imagines

Fandoms

VIDEO OF THIS ABOVE^

hey! this is NOT an update, just a thing for you to read if you want to understand fandoms better or are having a hard time in your fandom.
read if you want, and if you do please give me some feedback on if you liked it or not!! :)))))

fandoms-

you know what sucks? like a lot? more than anything really?
being in a fandom..

ok, go ahead laugh.

but really, it is.

you've become so fucking attached to the person (or people), investing your time and money in getting to know everything about them, smiling and grinning like a fool at everything they do, and even picturing yourself meeting them or being with them in the future. you are there biggest supporter in your eyes. you are always on the sidelines, rooting for them, and supporting them in everything they do. even creating made up scenarios that will never happen.

they are like your role model. you either want to be just like them, or be with them. a lot of us cry over them, and become upset and angry. they are our obsession and just a simple tweet or picture can make or break our day. they choose whether or not our day will be great.

but why?

and when we don't hear from them.. then what??

we begin wondering and thinking. making ourselves sick mentally and sometimes physically. we become annoyed and some even become depressed.

what if they are considering leaving us all together? are they dating someone they won't tell us about?? why can't they just talk to us?? was this there breaking point? are they even happy anymore?

but truly, the worst is when you can tell they are not happy. they are so upset. they aren't themselves. or are they? is this the real them?

you then begin to wonder even MORE.

is it because of us? is it there management making them do things they wouldn't ever do??

you want to fucking scream, on the top of your lungs.
WHY CANT I JUST TALK TO YOU??? I WANT YOU TO TELL ME EVERYTHING! cry out to them, but they will never hear.

your voice is muted and is somehow unable to hear.

You want to be there rock, like they are for you, all the fucking time.

they are there, when you feel like complete shit and feel like giving up.
you either watch an old videos of there's or listen to they're songs on repeat.. listening to there voices.slowly calming down, remembering that the sun ill come out tomorrow and this isn't the end.

you just want them. whether it be sexual or even just the need for them.  you want them next to you, laughing and just being in each other's presence. you want to be there little secret. the person they love the most, like in the fan fictions you read by the other millions of fans they have.

they are everything in your eyes. but you are just another "fan" in the crowd.

'fan'

the word makes me sick.
you want to be there friend. scratch that, You want to be there best friend. the person they tell everything to and spend almost every second together. making crazy memories and laughing the entire time. staying up till 4 in the morning, laughing about a joke told months ago, but somehow it's still hilarious.

take long drives and falling asleep in each other's arms.

but.. do you really know them??

are they really who you think they are?