Secrets and School

Original Ending

SERIOUS TRIGGER WARNING: Self-harm, suicidal thoughts and feelings.
Please read this only if will not get triggered. If you begin to feel triggered while reading this please STOP IMMEDIATELY.

Tears began to stream down Zoe's face. "We were doing so well Jake. So well." She hugged me tight, not caring if the blood on my wrists got on her clothes. We cried silently in each other's embrace.

"What am I going to do Zoe. The entire school will know by now that I am trans. And they probably are going to give me so much shit for that." I said, sobbing into her shoulder.

"It will be fine Jake. I promise. We will work this out." She said quietly, not sure if she believed in her own words.

We sat there for a while, just silent. No longer crying. Just sat there silently.

She looked over at my clock. "Its getting late now. Do you want me to stay the night?"

I shook my head. No. I smiled up at her, trying to put on a brave face. She smiled back before hugging me again. I showed her out of the door and told her to text me when she got home safely.

I went back up to my room, and looked around at nothing in particular. How could something so good turn so bad in a blink of an eye? I started thinking about all the things that I would have to face with everyone knowing I was trans. All the horrible things that I had to face at my previous school, I would now have to face here. I can't face this all over again. I felt the tears streaming down my face.

Walking to the bathroom, I thought of all the bad things that happened in my life. The tears came more rapidly now. I closed the bathroom door behind me, but didn't lock it. I started to run a bath. As the bath was filling up I turned to the cabinet and grabbed any bottles of pills I could find. I found six bottles that were roughly all half full. I tipped some pills into my cupped hand. I swallowed them. I poured another hand full. I got through the first two bottles and the bath was ready. I switched the tap off and sat in the warm water. I grabbed the bottles off of the floor, where I had left them for a second and poured a few more handfuls of pills. After a few minutes I began to feel kind of drunk. I laid down face first in the water.

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Zoe's point of view:

If only I had stayed that night. He would still be here.

He had been gone a week now. His mum walked into the bathroom, with empty medication bottles scattered across the floor. Her son unresponsive in the bath. An ambulance was called. But he was too far gone. There was nothing they could do. I was sat alone at our little spot, in the overgrowth. The bench seemed more uncomfortable now. The wind seemed colder. The sky seemed darker.

If only I had stayed that night. He would still be here.

Tears streamed down my face. He was the best friend I needed, he was the person to save me. But I couldn't save him.

If only I had stayed that night. He would still be here.

The bell went for last lesson in the distance. I dried my tears before making my way to class. Everything seemed so dull.

I arrived home and immediately went to my room and cried. I had done this everyday for the past week. I was lost. Mum and dad were still at work, but were due to arrive home in about half an hour. I walked calmly to the bathroom and to the cabinet. I took out a few bottle of medication and made my way back to my room. I found my water bottle in my school bag, and began taking the pills one by one. Once all the pills were gone, I laid under my blankets and went to sleep. In the hopes I wouldn't wake up.

If only I had stayed that night. He would still be here. But at least now I would join him. I never opened my eyes again.

THE END