Before I Go

Where it all began... Continued

   "Yes, of course we are still meeting. Will be there in about a hour and 15. See ya soon sis!" -Haven

"Okay sissy! Love you! 😘" -Bethany
I then sat my phone down on my lap and turned towards my mother, who was driving. She looks anxious and nervous. I know today is very a big day, I'm getting my results back to see if the tumors have spread or if the new treatments is working. Oh and did I mention I have terrible lungs . . . I have to take breathing treatments twice a week every week and carry an oxygen tank around so when I feel short of breath or dizzy I won't struggle for air. Life isn't the best at the moment. I have bad news pouring down on me like hurricane and it's very over whelming!

"Hey mate! Hope your appointment goes well! Let us know the results as soon as you can love! Xo h.s, the boys" -Harry and his friends
Of course he made me smile but didn't help me get my mind off the fact that this appointment can go two different ways and if it's what I am expecting, it will be just like the others, another disappointment! I hate to be Debby downer all the time but that's what my life seems to consist of here lately. Maybe I just need to start thinking more positive about every situation and I maybe be a little more happy with life itself!
Wow this is what it has come down to?! Me giving myself pep talks and my own advice! I'm a very lonely teenager!
My mom looks over at me as if she is worried about my mental health right now! Which is very true since she has caught me talking to myself a lot here recently. She keeps telling me to put myself out there and don't be afraid to try new things. You only live once! I see where she is coming from but I'm perfectly content with everything! At least that is what I try and tell myself every day!