Crossroads

Nature does nothing in vain

Song : Alanis Morissete - Uninvited

I was sitting by my big glass windows, holding a cup filled with fresh made coffee staring at the forest on the horizon. I was up half the night, trying to decide and then trying to sleep. Needless to say I failed on both accounts. I hadn't reached to a decision nor did I get much rest which is why I got up before the sun started to rise, took a shower and planted myself on the floor to watch the morning glory.

I was going to miss this. Whatever I choose to do, I would be leaving. Whether it was tomorrow or in two weeks, I would miss this life.

I was surrounded by boxes that contained almost all of my belongings. The most valuable ones, meaning everything that was in the basement and other objects that held a sentimental value, where going back home with my father in his truck while the rest was being picked up by a moving company sometime later this week. I would only keep my clothes, some books and my digital camera.

My father and I had a conversation before he left for his hotel room. This was a personal visit so he didn't want to stay in the pack house and my apartment was too crowded at the moment. After their Alpha's car dropped us at my house, we went upstairs and he proved to me once again his unwavering love and the trust he has in my judgment. He said that it would be my choice and whatever the outcome may be, he would support me. He understood the significance of a mate in the life of a wolf and being that he and my mother weren't true mates but matches, he was certain that if compatible, this could turn out to something wonderful. And also, he was just a phone call away if I needed him. He wasn't alarmed about my safety, he knew the power the contract held on each of the counter parts and Alpha Barker was a respected and powerful leader amongst the regions. In a way, the contract eased his worries. My status would be confirmed and recognized as a real mate, not just two people getting to know each other.

I let a sigh escape me and my wolf picked up her head front her paws and send me a little bark to confirm that she was here with me and not resting. It was so much easier for her to decide, her nature was more basic than mine. She wanted this wolf, she wanted to connect with him and feel his essence in the way only mates can. This was new to her too and it excited her, never has she felt the pull for another in such a way. She felt my reluctance and although it made no sense to her, as an animal she would always be drawn to the strongest provider and protector, she was waiting for me to come to the most obvious answer of all. Nature does nothing in vain.

That phrase was stuck in my mind since I got home and was left alone to ponder. The moon, in which we put our faith in and Mother Nature, deemed the two of us suitable for pairing. True, there were others out there but there wasn't an unlimited number. I didn't actually know how many did we get because most wolfs chose the first or second match that came into their lives. True mates were almost as rare as seeing a unicorn and the chances of meeting him or her were few to none. They were supposedly blessed and destined for greatness.

That was another thing that worried me. He said that he already met two others and he wasn't inclined to complete the mating. What exactly did that mean? In what way did he find them lacking? What were his criteria for rejecting them? I understood that he will most likely have high expectations, given his position but were his reasons reasonable or was he overly demanding? I wouldn't get any answers on that unless I agreed to follow him. I pretty much guessed that our norms for the final decisions would be different. He didn't strike me as one who would put love high in the list but it was pretty up in mine. Although I could be mistaken. After all, I hardly knew him.

At least I knew that he was attracted to me. As I with him. Come to think of it, I would find him handsome and desirable even without the pull of the bond. My first impressions were very favorable to his physique and presence and last night, even with my anxiety over the situation, I felt drawn to him. I wanted him to touch me, whisper more words into my ears, place light kisses to my neck. It was alarming that a complete stranger could invoke such desires. The thought that if we exchanged blood and connected our minds and wolfs would only enhance our emotions was awfully tempting and scary. It would give us both the opportunity to make a more responsible decision at the end of the agreement because we will experience the full package beforehand but it could also cloud our judgment. But that was true for all mated wolves.

The sun had risen and it looked like it would be a glorious day. People started to appear on the street, walking to their cars or bikes, starting their day. The clock was ticking.

It all came down to if I wanted to take my chances with him even if it was for a short while. The prospect of this pull turning to a permanent bond at the end of September was a question for another day. I always liked to focus at the matter in hand and not worry about prospective problems and decisions. It only brought unneeded frustration and ridiculous speculations since I didn't have all the facts and the future was unpredictable. Set a strong foundation and deal with whatever comes next.

Did I trust him? No, how could I, I didn't know him and his whole behaviour was cryptic and I had many questions, including the procedures of the bonding. My insight was limited. Did I trust myself? Yes, even though this was uncharted territory and new experiences and people often changed your way of thinking but I was confident in my abilities and strength to hold my own. These years away from the company of other wolves, had taught me a lot. Actually that could be also a problem. I would have to get used living in a pack and its restrictions and a foreign one at that. I would deal with it.

Did I want him?... Yes, yes I wanted him very much indeed. My dreams were filled with visions of his wolf, running in the wild and shifting into his human side when he sees me bathing in the river, approaching me like a predator and...

Needless to say, I had very vivid dreams about Ian.

I laughed at that.I finally had a name. Ian..I got up and searched for my purse from last night. While we were giving our appreciation for dinner and getting ready to leave, he handed me his number discreetly, wishing me a good night. He walked away but I could feel his eyes roaming my body from somewhere in the room.

I looked at my watch on the wall and realized it was almost eight. I had to start getting organized. There was so much to do if I wanted to be ready to leave tomorrow.

I called my father at his hotel. He picked up at the second ring.

"Good morning Papa wolf. Have you been awake long?"

"Good morning pup, yes I was just getting ready to come to you. Have you eaten? I'll take you out for breakfast or I can pick up something on the way?" I smiled, always checking to see if I ate.

"No, I haven't. Let's go out, it's a beautiful morning and we have lots to talk about. It would be better if we were out in the sun, I need a little fresh air to clear my head" the thought appealed to my wolf as well.

"Alright. Vivian..." he hesitated.

"It's fine dad. Yes, I made my decision, I will go with him." I didn't want to leave my father wondering until he came to take me out. The rest we would discuss over breakfast and my stomach complained almost immediately. Now that I was calm, the fact that I hardly ate dinner last night was painfully noticed.

"I'll be there in twenty minutes, be ready" he didn't want to lose any more time.

'I will be". I hang up the phone and looked at Ian's number. I would call him around noon. No need to seem too eager. 

This is a little shorter than the others but I felt like it should stop here, plot wise. My gratitude goes  to everyone who took time from their life to read this so far.