Finding Love After Marriage (A Muslimah Love story)

Chapter 26

Zahan POV

Its almost two days now since she properly talked to me,she will only reply to my questions avoiding any extra chats,its not like i didnt try i did but she always manage to find excuse

Today she decided to travel Glacier-Express. It is a train line that covers amazing landscapes throughout the highest glaciers of Switzerland. It is a 7½ hours trip that will lead you through 291 bridges, 91 tunnels and across the highest point at 2'033 m (6'670 ft). All comfortably sitting in a full-comfort train.The Glacier Express is the most famous railway in the world.

Once she enter the train she was all back to that whole excited phase,we being the first class ticket passengers the hospitality was as i expected and it really pleased Zara though she didnt show it to me but i could see it in her eyes

She was looking outside the window whole time,i wont blame her the view itself was breath taking,this indeed was a beautiful train journey but it would have been even beautiful if she would have shoot out loads of questions like Zahan whats that and that,what do you call that place and other loads of question,ahhh i really miss her blabering i know its been just a month but i really got used of her,i know i have anger issues but i never regret about it as much as i was doing now but what was bothering me more was not knowing what was she thinking right now,i really wanted to know whats running in her mind now,is she in a mood to forgive me or is she going to drag it longer

3 Hours passed and still we both were silent,now its really freaking bothering me, i mean comeon it was not such a big thing that she is dragging it this far

"Zara?"she turned to look towards me

"If you are angry on me,why dont you spill it out?" she glared at me then it hit me,may be i use wrong tone

"im not angry"her eyes still focusing on the window

"Then why arent you speaking to me?"this time i made sure to sound as polite as i could

"Im"

"but then why dont i feel like you are? "

"cz im being caution not to act or do anything which might make you angry,im..im...scared of you"her words made my heart sank even deeper

"Scared of ME?"i was not sure how i looked shocked or suprised as i was feeling both inside

"Im...im scared of being me with you,i know you shouted on me cz u were worried for me but the way you shouted kinda scared me,so i decided that il make sure i dont do or act anyway which might make you angry,i know im a bit clumsy,act stupidly first i thought you liked those stuff about,i felt so free being myself with you,now you shouted at me cz of the same stuff"her words were like she was crying inside

"Zara,i didnt mean it that way,dont have to stop yourself from being you"i was dissapointed now i thought she would understand my anger issues but what she said upset me she is scared of me,she dont want to be herself with me,instead of understanding and accepting me she choose the other way she choose distance

we both were silent after that,it kinda hurted me her words her thoughts all of them.

Zara POV

"Zara,you once asked why im different with you when i said i feel comfortable with you i think you didnt understood what i actually meant,you see no body is perfect nor im i,i have this anger issue of mine which make me keep distance from others,when i get angry i lost control over myself and people are afraid of my anger they find me rude a version of hitler you can say,but deep inside i too wanted some one who could accept me with my anger who would feel comfortable with me for whom my anger wont matter who could handle me and being with you i felt i could be with you who im, i could be ME i though my anger wont be issue for you but you too like others chose distance" his words held so much of pain inside

My words really hurted him,i really felt bad for what i said to him,i was now realising how he felt that time,he just didnt find the right way to express his worry for me which came out in the form anger just like now how my words came out all wrong,i didnt mean to hurt his feelings

They say first fight is always the hardest,now i understood why islam says to keep your mouth shut when you are angry,if i had kept my mouth shut im sure our fight wouldnt have gotten to this phase

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"Zara we have our flight this afternoon,start packing your stuff"i thought he said we are staying for a week i guess we are leaving i didnt feel like arguing or ask him why cz i know the reason i was the reason

We came back i was aware we will be asked loads of question but Zahan had already planned an excuse Urgent Work!

I know i had to do something about it but i wasnt sure what to,im just waiting for the right time and right situation cz i dont wana mess up like one stupid dialogue of mine and im dropped straight from switzerland to here...

Emotions for Men and Women are same but just the way they express are different,we need to find a way to sort things out

"Zahan?arent you coming to sleep?"i asked seeing him still working while i was awaiting for him, for us to sleep together as we use to!

"No,i have work,you can sleep if you want"this made me lose my patience,i was waiting for him to sort things between us but he does seem like making effort

"Thats it"i raised my voice and walked toward him,he had an questioning expression in his eyes

"Whats wrong with you?you are going to let one stupid fight come between us just like that?"i looked into his eyes

"Me?Me?im letting this fight come between us or you?"now he raised his voice,we are going to have a hell of argument today but i want to clear thing either if it has be done through argument,argument it is then

"Yes,Yes You,you are the one who brought me back from our honeymoon,how could you?"

"Me,you are the one who spoiled our honeymoon first lady"

Lady what do you mean lady,im your wife im your wife Mr.Zahan malik im your Mrs.Zahan not any lady"

"Oh,now you remember ur my wife woo great so all of sudden you remember claiming rights on me?"

"Yes im your wife,i can claim my rights on you any time,i have i have "i couldnt find exact word to express"i have copyright on you"he widened his eyes on the word copyright,i know copyright wasnt the correct word to use at this situation but i ran out of words

"So where did that copyright went when i scolded,that was same copyright i used on you to show my worry for you but you didnt understand nor did you accept so why should i,why should i give you right on me when you didnt give me rights on you"

"what ever,look you hurt me i hurt you so its done and done,need not drag this any further,i know im stupid but so are you,if im bad in expressing feelings you are not good at it either,you have flaws i have flaws but we are perfect for each other and YOU! listen to me carefully there is no way on earth that im going to let ur stupid anger or my stupid behaviour or any stupid fight come between Us! do you understand?"he looked at me in suprised and to my suprise he just nodded as Yes

"what do you want me to do now?"

"I want to shut your laptop first and i want you in bed right now"i demanded he just smiled and shut his laptop and we went to bed,i know its a weird way to end our fight but i was happy that finally our fight ended..

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hey guys this chapter is for all those ZAHRA lovers who kept on requesting for a new chapter,i really really am busy and i guess il be busy a little longer please please dont mind i guess i have to keep you guys on hold again...