F O U R T E E N

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I finally stopped crying. Now I'm just sitting in my room looking like hell at 8:42 in the morning, going through my feed while eating ice cream.

I don't know why I'm so upset about this. I wasn't dating Ricky he didn't cheat on me again.

But he made me believe he loved me this time. He made me fall for him again.

I decide to go take a shower.

I hop in the shower. I decide to practice burning in hell because we all know I'm going there. So I turn the water extra hot.

I scrub myself clean and wash my hair.

I hop out of the shower and do my make up, doing simple foundation,  eyeliner and mascara.

I get dressed in a Ghosting shirt and black skinny jeans.

It's now 9:25. Sam can get out of the hospital at 10 and it takes a bit to get there.

I make a coffee and leave the house.

The guys are coming over at 12 so they can help us pack up and we can have dinner together.

I'm not even sure if I want to move with them anymore.

I guess I'll just have to talk with Sam about it.

I arrive at the hospital and got out.

I went to Sam's room and saw her getting all the IV's taken out of her arm.

"Sam!" I smiled.

"Chey!" Sam grinned.

I signed the release papers and I got her the hell out of that place.

"So the guys invited us to move in with them," I say.

"That's all the way in America though,"

"I know and I thought we could do that but now I don't think I want to," I frown.

"Why not?" Sam asks.

"Because Ricky broke my heart.. He kissed me and told me he loves me.. but he's with Jessica," I explained.

"Oh hun I'm so sorry," Sam's voice soft.

"It's fine. But it's also up to you if you wanna move," I say.

"I don't care, as long as we're together," Sam offers me a small smile.

I fake smile back.

We get home at noon.

The guys should be here soon.

"Are you sure you'll be okay being around him?" Sam asked.

"Yeah I just won't acknowledge him," I shakily say.

I'm not gonna move with them. Being around Ricky will be just too much for me.

My thoughts get interrupted by a knock on the door.

I take a deep breath and open the door.

All the guys except Ricky hug me tight.

"Okay, let's get you two packed and ready to go," Devin says cheerfully.

"Actually, We're not going..." I mumble.

The smiles fall into a frown and disappointed faces.

"W-why? you're crazy!" Ryan exclaims.

"I-um," I didn't know what to say, I don't want them being pissed at Ricky.

"Because I fucked up," Ricky spoke up.

"Oh god, you didn't," Chris groans.

Ricky looks at Chris guiltily.

"I told you not to get too close with her unless you were going to break up with Jessica!!" Chris shouts. "And now because you didn't listen to me, Cheyenne isn't moving with us!"

Chris takes a huge breath and gives me a sympathetic look. I give one back to him.

"Look guys I would love to move with you guys but being around him is giving me a lot of heartache," I spoke truthfully.

Chris sighs nodding.

Ricky just stands there awkwardly looking at me, I just glare at him.

I huff. I want to move with them so much. But it's too hard being around Ricky.

Sam looks at me and gestures me to follow her.

"I-I'll be back in a sec," I say to the guys.

They all just hum, the feel of disappointment in the air.

I exit the house with Sam and she immediately hugs me.

"I'm sorry all of this is happening," She says.

"I just, I want to move with them, I just don't want to be around Ricky, but I want to forgive him," I cry.

"But, if we don't move with them, he'll never get the chance to make it up to you, you'll never be able forgive him, you might cut contact with the guys again, you'll be missing a great opportunity to live with your best friends," Sam speaks softly.

Then I realize, I don't have to forgive Ricky. I won't let what Ricky did to me, stop me from moving with the guys.

I'm gonna move with them.

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