Don't you remember?

September 19th: The Daisies

My legs carried me out of the school and I tore down the street. Thousands of twisted thoughts begin to flood my mind. Why isn't she her? Why are they acting the way they are? The wind hits my burning face making me come to reality. I'm standing on the street, my backpack slung over my shoulder, and my body shaking. I begin to walk again letting the burning in my legs to subside. Something happened to us all after the accident. Bellamy left for a school in Ireland. Jake stopped talking to anyone who wasn't on the soccer team. Lacey lost the kindness she once had. And Eliza. . .she just stopped. . . .Stopped smiling, stopped eating, stop being her. They put her in a hospital a year ago. I guess I reacted just as they did. I changed. 

I walk quietly towards the forest turning down the dirt path only we knew about. I don't pay much attention to anything. Pebbles click below my feet, the wind moans through the trees, and all I think about is a set of eyes. The same set of eyes I've spent the past five years trying to forget. I keep my head down and walk quietly into the forest. I used to know every tree and flower, but now everything has changed. The vines have grown into crooked claws, the wind screams with sorrow, and the path is overgrown beyond recognition. Something snaps me from my trance. A noise maybe, but there's something that truly catches my attention. Daisies. They're still in bloom. They make me think fondly of Bellamy. He loved daisies. People used to mock him for it, but it was the flower that represented us. It represented his affection towards all of us. How he cared for Lacey and Eliza. How Jake and Ashland took him on great adventures. How I showed him the world of books. He left a month after we lost him. He couldn't stand the sight of us all. I guess he got out before it killed him. If only Eliza did the same. Then maybe it would have saved her. The air sends chills through my body. My senses suddenly heighten. I look around feeling my heart begin to race. I know this place. Where did I wander?

I keep moving forward feeling something pulling me through the thick brush. Memories begin to flash through my mind. Laughter. Tears. Flowers. Summer. This was our place. Our kingdom. When we were here we were the kings and queens of our own world.  I finally reach the spot by the lake. The tree house we spent hours in. Where we would create our own magical realm. Where we ruled over all beings of our forest. That's when my stomach lurches. Sitting up on the top level sits a boy - more of a man really. Messy brown curls hang over his eyes. He's weaving a crown of daisies. Pure silence falls over the scene. He doesn't seem to notice me, and I'm not sure that's a bad thing. Tears well in my eyes. The runt I once knew is gone, but the same face remains. Bellamy.

"B-Bellamy,"I squeak letting some tears fall to my cheeks. His head turns and our eyes lock. His eyes are red with tears, and single daisy is tucked behind his ear. Just as I remember. Bright eyes and soft features. 

"Lyra?"He smiles kindly down from his perch. "Why are you here?"

"I could ask the same of you."My voice breaks. This place has brought nothing but darkness to us. I thought I had lost the way here. Once he left, I could no longer find my way back. Not until today. 

"I'm home for now, or whatever this town is to me."His voice sounds sad but angry. "I remember the day we came to this place."

"So do I,"I say wiping away my tears and smiling fondly at the old spot by the lake. Our spot. I throw my backpack down before climbing up the rickety ladder onto the lowest platform entering the worn down first level of the three-story fortress. Everything is still in its place. After five years of storms and winter blizzards, not a single treasure is out of place. On the shelves, wooden animals carved from wood sit in their places among the acorns and dead leaves. A horse, a bear, a wolf, a cat, a rabbit, and a sparrow. Jake used to carve them. They represented us. I was the sparrow and Bellamy was the horse.

"Everything is still here. Frozen in time."He says noticing my fascination."I thought it would have fallen apart and blown away in the wind by now."

"I thought it was gone. I could never find my way back. Not until today."I say looking up at him."The daisies led me here."He looks down at the crown in his hand and smiles softly. 

"I missed this place. . . "

"This is the last we have of him."

"It's the last we have of us."

"Lacey, Eliza, and Jake no longer speak."

"I saw them all, but Eliza. Where is she?"He looks at me worriedly. I cannot tell him what has happened to her. He left before he knew what was happening to her. He abandoned her. I try to keep from shaking at the very thought. 

"She's in a hospital. She has been for a year."I state my voice hollow and cold. 

"What do you mean?!"He nearly shouts his voice shaking. 

"I mean, she broke. She's gone. She stopped eating. They found her on the floor bleeding out. Screaming."I snap rage boiling my blood.

"No. . . . "His voice trails off."S-she couldn't have. She's Eliza. She's strong."

"Maybe she once was, but no one has heard from her since she left, and I only received a letter from her mother telling me what had happened."His features look so broken, and tears begin to stream down his cheeks. 

"I-it's my f-fault. . ."He cries resting his head in his hands. I climb up to the platform far above me and sit beside him. I rest my head on his shoulder letting the sadness hit me like a bullet. My chest aches. What have we become?