Solace and Nox: A New Light

Chapter 7

This was the day Raiden had been dreading all week. It was the day that the families of the fallen men gathered for one large funeral. All of the men were Raiden's men, whereas these families were only there for the one soldier. They only lost the one soldier, while Raiden lost them all.

The sky was overcast, and it was beginning to rain. The light sprinkle didn't lift anyone's mood. In fact, it somehow made the day more gloomy.

Raiden, and the other captains in the army were the pallbearers for each and every soldier. They switched sides each casket, just so they didn't exert their arm muscles.

They were about three miles outside of Shodon, where the official gravesite lied. Horse-pulled carriages held the caskets. Each time Raiden laid down a casket, he felt like he was ripping a piece of his soul and burying it with these men. It was an emotional day.

The final casket was of Myles Rayner, Trace's brother, and a good friend. Lowering Myles's casket hurt more than any other, especially after the promise Raiden had made to Trace. As difficult as it was going to be, Raiden was going to stay true to that promise. Even if it lead to him in one of those caskets.

When the captains went for Myles's casket, they were stopped by Trace. Trace insisted on carrying his brother. He wouldn't have it any other way, so Direl stepped aside and let Trace take his place. They lowered Myles into his grave with tear-stained faces. Even Direl shed a tear or two. Funerals weren't hard for just the families.

Trace looked Raiden in the eye, and nodded slightly. Raiden didn't feel he deserved Trace's respect, but he knew that he might as well give him a reason to respect Raiden.

Then came the moment that Raiden dreaded most.

The eulogy.

King Lotharius asked Raiden to speak on behalf of all the men. Not wanting to refuse the king, he accepted.

Raiden stood in front of the families and fellow soldiers. His green uniform looked more professional than usual, with his sleeves rolled down and clipped with cuffs.

"I cannot express the emotions that are present here tonight," Raiden started, the rain picking up slightly. "I don't know what you are feeling, but I know what I am feeling. Am I feeling sad for you good families? Am I feeling hatred for the man who caused the deaths of these good men? The answer is no.

"I am feeling happy for these men. I happy about the lives that these men lived. Reminiscing every moment I spent with them is a million joys in each memory. I remember every moment I spent training with these men, fighting by their side, and having a good time after a difficult day at work. When I look at each of your faces, I can see pain, or loss. But I am here to tell you that you need not be sad.

"I have done everything in power not to think about the bad side of things these past few days. Nothing is worse than witnessing good men--good friends--fall, and you being powerless against it. I have a million reasons to feel the same emotions that you may be feeling right now, but have made the choice to see the good.

"When I see these caskets, I try to remember the good things about the men that lie inside them. Yes, they are no longer physically with us, but they are alive in our hearts. When we remember them, and think of the memories we share with them, they will be with us. And the more you think about them, the longer those memories will stay with you.

"So, please, remember these men. Remember the good times spent with them, and always keep them in your hearts. That is what's going to pull you through the day. That's what will lead you through the darkness. Let them be your light. It will save you."

Raiden looked at the tear-stained faces of the families. He was able to keep from bursting into tears himself until he saw Trace. He had the brief thought of what would happen if he failed Trace like he did Myles. Would he be able to live with himself?

Raiden left the crowd. He isolated himself to try and take his own advice, and remember the good things. It was difficult, but it helped him keep his sanity.

As the families left the gravesite one by one, Raiden began to regain his calm. The last one to leave the graveyard was Trace. When Trace was out of sight, Raiden approached each gravestone, giving his friends the goodbye he wasn't able to give before.

When he reached Myles's gravestone, he choked. He couldn't find the right words. It took him several minutes to figure something out.

"Myles," he started. "I will do everything in my power to make sure your brother is safe."

Raiden broke down after that. He knelt down, leaned against Myles's gravestone and cried.

Then there was a snap that came from behind.

Raiden spun to see a shadow zoom by from the corner of his eye. Was someone watching him? Was someone following him around? Or was he just going insane?

No.

He knew the answer. Someone was watching his every move, but they were too shy, or too afraid to approach him.

"Whoever is there, whoever has been following me around, can show yourself at any time. I know you are there, so feel free to come out," he shouted. His voice echoed through the empty graveyard. Raiden couldn't be going crazy... could he?

Raiden shrugged, touched Myles's gravestone one last time, and returned to Shodon.