(This chapter might get a little graphic, you have been warned)
Do you ever get the feeling like your in Limbo? A place between heaven and hell, where you are confused and feel alone? This is how I felt, when I arrived back home after that long night. Me and Felix said nothing the whole ride home, just silence, just like in Limbo.
I got out of the car and made my way to my apartment door. I fiddled with my keys, and shoved the correct key in the key hole. I entered and Felix followed close behind me. I gave him a look I don't think I ever gave him, some what a look of disgust. Maybe it was just because I was tired, and the bags under my eyes proved that.
Whatever my look was supposed to mean, he got the message to leave me alone. I trudged into our bedroom, and flopped down on the bed, covering myself in the white blankets that lay on it. I could hear Felix messing around in the kitchen. I didn't care.
We had a night out to our self, something fun, and it was ruined because of one of Felix's stupid ideas. I look back on it now, and Felix was the one for Ryan's stupid head problem. He came up with the idea.
The more I thought about it, the more my hatred started to grow. We went weeks, months with awkward small talk. We got into a lot more fights. It got to the point where I didn't even smile when I saw his hair, the sun, blue, and definitely not red. Now came the day I had been planning for. I was going to tell him how I felt. Felix sat in his recording room, and I heard him do his signature outro.
I took a deep shaky breath in, and I slowly made my way to Felix's office. I pushed open the door and I see him browsing twitter. The fans still don't know w are dating. He never bothered to tell them. He hears me enter, but refuses to look at me. The tension has been high.
"Hey Felix..." I say trying to keep from breaking down. He still doesn't look at me, but keeps browsing through twitter.
"What." He mumbles, stopping his scrolling. I let out a sigh at least letting me know he knows I am here and is some what willing to have a conversation.
"Felix I haven't really been happy..." I take another deep breath in, trying to hold back tears. Inside I desperately try to hold back tears.
"Neither have I." He says motionless.
"Why?" I ask him.
"Well, I have been with you about 8 or 9 months now and I haven't been laid. Um number two you won't talk to me. Number three, your always whining. You know it would be easier if you just left." His words struck me hard. I stopped for a moment, taking a knife in my chest. Tears escape my eyes, and I want to fall to my knees. He looks at me annoyed, raising an eyebrow.
"Are you going or what?" He asks me. I sob into my hands. "(Y/N), Jesus Christ stop crying. Get over yourself!" He yells. I don't respond right away. I wipe the tears in my eyes and look him in the eyes.
"I thought you loved me!" I yell tears still managing to escape my eyes. His eyes meet mine.
"I don't love you anymore."
I run out of the house sobbing. I take the keys out of my purse and start to drive. Anywhere is fine. I sob as I do. Before I know it, I pull up at a bar. Anything past that I don't remember. the alcohol is setting in. I slam another twenty on the counter. I order another Jack, and wait as the bar tender takes the 5 empty glasses I have on the counter and pours another. I try not to think about Felix.
"(Y/N)? What are you doing here?" I turn my head to see who it is. At first I see nothing but a blurr, but my eye sight focuses to see Sean (Jack). His green hair hits me in the face, making my eyesight blurry again. From what I can make out, he is wearing a black sweatshirt and a winter beanie. I give a crooked smile.
"Hey Jack what's up? Uh nothing I am just here because Felix and I got into a little fight. Well not little, were done haha." I feel like crying again, but I hold it in. The bar tender brings over my drink and I chug it. I turn my attention back to Jack who is frowning.
"(Y/N) that is terrible..." He grows sorrowful.
"Yeah it's fine. I just have no where to go." Jacks eyes light up as I say so.
"Your not able to drive, want to come back to my hotel? I'm here for a Youtube thing and I have one." I smile.
"Yes Jack. I would like to do that." I try to stand, but fail. Jack catches me and gives me an awkward smile. He leads me to his car, and seats me in it. We drive to his hotel, and I stagger in. He seats me on the couch and sits down next to me. Like reading my mind, he gives me a large bucket, as I throw up into it.
"Feeling better?" he asks in his cute Irish accent. I nod. "There is only on bedroom sadly. Theres the hotel toothbrush, I haven't used that, and you can borrow one of my long shirts for sleepwear." I nod again, and brush my teeth. I am starting to take control of my body again which is good. When I finish, Jack is in the doorway. He hands me a shirt. I smile, as he returns it he leaves and I shut the door. I change and the shirt hangs a foot or so past my thighs.
At this point, I'm not as drunk as I was earlier. I walk out to the living room of the hotel and find Jack. He is sitting on the couch. I go and join him. Before I know it, one thing leads to another and his mouth is on mine. The kisses are passionate. I grip his hair as he kisses me. (I'M SO AWKWARD AT WRITING SMUT. THIS ISN'T EVEN SMUT ITS JUST KISSES.)He makes his may down my neck, and I assist him at taking his shirt off. He breaks the kiss for a moment to help me. Now he lay shirtless as I stare at his chest. He gives me a smirk and it isn't long before we are back at it. He gives a hard tug at the shirt he gave me, and due to how loose it is it comes of quickly. I feel a little awkward in my bra in underwear, but I push it aside.
The kisses continue until they turn into something more. The next morning, my head pounds. I don't remember anything of last night. That's when I see Jack who is sleeping on the couch alongside me. At first I feel a little strange, but then a sick feeling on my stomach sinks. I had sex with Jack the first night I hung out with him, yet I never had sex with Felix, while in the eight months I dated him. Plus Jack is one of his best friends. Panic flows over me. The morning sun peers into the window, and I look around the room. I feel lost in limbo.
Oh boy. Wasn't that slight smut scene just great? Sorry for the long gap between my updates. I will be adding your guys suggestions next chapter! Have fun with your smut.
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