1:57am

2:15am

2:15am

"Are you serious?"

"Yep."

"Holy fuck. What are the odds?"

"I know right."

"Too bad I'm not home right now. I could've come over."

"Now that sounds very suggestive."

"Anne you dirty thing! I would've made sure you're okay, ordered pizza, and shown you the wonders of the film version of Anne of Green Gables."

"Pizza? At three in the morning?"

"Okay maybe not ordered pizza. Homemade pizza."

"I don't think I would trust your cooking."

"Why not?"

"You don't sound like a person who can cook."

"Well, my dear, sad friend, I am in fact studying to become a chef at university."

"You're joking."

"Nope."

"Wow."

"I'm totally joking."

"You dick!"

"It's true."

"Now I definitely don't trust you."

"Too late. I already know where you live."

"You don't know which side though."

"I'll try both. It's a fifty-fifty chance. Plus, I'm pretty sure I've seen you around."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"When have you seen me?"

"Oh, I don't know. Whenever really."

"I've never seen you."

"I'm never home."

"Why not?"

"I'm out."

"Doing what?"

"Living."