Wild Things

Stupid Love

Tuesday: Carmela's POV

"Aubrey we can work on the project tomorrow, I have a study session with Jaden today. I can't miss it because we haven't had one in forever"
"I know Aub, I promise we will work on it tomorrow.... Okay.... Yes.. Alright, bye"
I sighed and hung up the phone.
So much was running through my mind, the last thing I needed was Aubrey nagging my ear off about a project that's due next week.

Me and Jaden have barely even talked since the kiss. I shouldn't have led him on like that.. I don't want to hurt him. I'm just going to have to talk to him and sort all of this out.

I get out of my car and head towards Jaden's house. I ring the door bell and wait a couple seconds for him to open the door.

Suddenly I hear the locks to the door click, and the door swishes open, revealing Jaden, shirtless.
I feel my body tense up. My heart begins to beat aggressively out of my chest. I guess breaking the ice is going to be harder than I thought.
"h-hey carm" he greeted me. I could tell he was a little uncomfortable the way he ran his fingers through his hair and tilted his head down.
A tiny smiled formed on my lips.
"Hey Jaden"
There was a long pause, as if we didn't know what to say to each other. We were speechless.
His eyes were locked onto mine and I could feel the intensity rising between us.

I instantly leapt into his arms, straddling his waist. Our lips pressed against each other, moving in sync. My hands traveled through his hair tugging it, as our lips embraced each other. He gripped my ass and closed the door with his foot, managing to keep our lips in contact. He carried me to the couch and threw me down onto the soft cushions. He broke the kiss and slid off my shirt, revealing my black bra. He bit his lip and reunited our lips. I began moaning against his lips. He unbuttoned my pants and slid his hand down to my private area, causing me to throw my head back and moan. His fingers teased my area and I moaned even louder. "Stick it in pleasee" I moaned. He smirked and his fingers slowly..

"Hello? Carm?" Jaden was waving his hand in front of my face.
My mouth was full of drool. I swallowed it and came back to reality.
"Oh, sorry what did you say?"

"I asked if you wanted to come in" he chuckled.
"Oh, yea" I smiled, awkwardly.
I walked in and he closed the door behind me.
As i walked in I examined his house.. It was comfy looking. I liked it.
I headed upstairs to his room so we could start.
I sighed as I entered the room, not looking forward to what I had to say.
I sat on his bed and opened my textbook.
He followed after me into the room
"Alright let's start with polynomials"
Great.
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15 minutes later...
"Alright good, so what's the answer?"
I sigh.
"Idk five? Ugh I don't get this.. It's just too hard"
"No it's not, you don't strike me as a person who gives up very easily, so don't be that person today. C'mon you can do this, and I'm going to help you." He encouraged.
I couldn't stop staring at his abs, god why is he all of a sudden so.... Attractive?
He continued to explain the lesson but I had a hard time focusing. In my head I kept thinking of ways to tell him that we can't be together.
"...does that make sense?" He asked.
I wasn't paying attention.
There was a little silence. I could feel him looking at me, searching for an answer. I looked up at him so that our eyes could meet.
"No" I answered breathlessly.
He didn't say anything and just continued to hold my stare. It was obvious I wasn't talking about polynomials.

I hate it when he looks at me, his brown doughy eyes just make it so easy to ruin everything.
I leaned in a little as if in a trance,wanting to unite our lips, but then, as if slapped by reality, I leaned away and turned my head.
"None of this makes sense, which is why that night at the beach was a huge mistake" I said with a shaky voice. Saying those words was actually painful.
He cleared his throat.
"W-why do you say that?"
"What do you mean 'why do I say that?' You know why. We aren't meant for each other"
"W-well who cares who we're meant to be with, it's about what feels right to us... And that kiss felt.. Right, right?"
I sighed and closed my eyes struggling to hold back tears. Knowing that I was lying to him about something that we both felt was right, made me feel heartless..
"No" I said with a strained voice. Lies leaked through my voice when I said that.
He remained silent.
"Can you look at me?" He asked with a warm voice
"No"
"Look at me" he slightly demanded.
I kept my head turned. My breaths suddenly shortened.
I suddenly felt his fingers on my chin, turning my head towards him.
I could feel that my eyes were glassy, with teardrops threatening to fall at the slightest blink.
He looked deeply into my eyes, while his hand rested on my cheek, with his thumb rubbing it.
My strategy isn't working. In order for him to get the point I have to be more harsh... Even though I don't want to hurt him..

"Jaden I don't want you, we are just friends, all we're ever going to be is friends, okay? Let's not ruin that" I said trying to maintain a believable voice. I pushed his hand away from my face.
He continued to look at me, searching for some truth in all the lies I was telling.

"Yea, um, y-you're right" he said clearing his throat a little.
I nodded my head hesitantly, forcing myself to try and believe everything we said to each other.
I stood up from his bed.
"Alright I've got to go. I'll see you next time okay?" I said gathering my things. I swung my book bag over my shoulder and glanced at him. His head was tilted down. He couldn't even look at me..
Tears started to form in my eyes as I looked at him, just sitting there, probably with a broken heart. I did that..
I walked over to him and lightly kissed him on the head. I took a deep breath, still trying to contain my tears, and made my way out of the room.
"Bye" I whispered as I walked out the door and closed it behind me.

Before I walked away, I turned around, extending my hand to open the door again, instantly regretting my decision, then I pulled my hand back in. I decided to leave his house before I changed my mind.

My head was still trying to wrap itself around what exactly just happened. Tears still remained in my eyes, threatening to fall at any moment.
"No, stop carm.. You're not going to cry" I said as I smacked myself, trying to toughen up. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath..
"I'm fine"
This is the right thing to do... I can't just fuck up our friendship like that... He knows that if we were in a relationship, it'd be toxic. And I'm not going to do that.. not again.
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Jaden's POV
I knew it. Why would a girl like that ever want to be with a guy like me? I mean c'mon she's done more things in a week than I've done in year. She's exciting and spontaneous, and I'm...not.
I'm not even her type. She even told me not to fall for her! And I did, like an idiot, thinking I could change her or something like we're in some movie or something. I drove her away thinking we could actually be together... So.fucking.stupid.
I can't believe I let this happen..