Just A Kiss - BoyxBoy -Complete-

Kean

Kean

It wasn't long enough when Li started hitting my chest. "Damn it Kean, let me go!" But all I did was push myself further in so that he can't move his arms. "Kean, what the fuck is wrong with you now! Stop it. I said let me go!" With all his might, he finally was able to push me away from him and sobbed. He dropped all the bags he was holding and knelt down, wiping off his lips. He is so disgusted of what I did to him now. I have never imagined myself to this such a jerk especially to my boyfriend. "Li, I'm so sorry. Li, please. I love you. I just wanted you no to become so jealous over Daniel because I admitted I still have feelings for him. But, I told you already, it doesn't matter anymore. I have you and he can never ever replace you." I tried to hug him but he was fighting for it. He covers his face with his knees adjust cried there like a kid. "Li, please. Let me in."

Soon though, he starts to calm down. He rested his back against the wall and stared blankly down the pavement. I sat down across him. "Li, please, listen to me. I love you, and no matter what happens, I will still always love you." He never moved a single inch from his position. He was like stone-gazed, never did move for such a long time. "I worry about you, and you know how I do." He glared at me with such anger, that much disgust. "You pathetic fool. Do you think you can blind me with those words? You said it yourself; you still have feelings for Daniel. I'm just some trash that is stopping you from loving the real person you loved. Tell me honestly, Kean. You just love me because you pity me, right?"

I almost fell on my stand when those words came from his mouth. It felt like something hit me hard on my face, something like I'm getting beaten up, trashing me around, pulping every single humanity in me. "No, I don't love you because I pity you. I love you because that is what I truly feel for you, not just some useless, ignorant feeling. It's what keeps me motivated for our relationship to work and last. It is not just something that I feel for you; it is the bond that makes that feeling." I knelt down and pulled him in for a hug. He shook his body trying to avoid my arms around him; still I wrapped it around him. All he would do is tap them away as hard as he can. It seems like we are getting quite the attention of some people passing by but I don't mind them. I wan t Li to listen to me right now.

"Li, please stop this foolishness already." I kissed his forehead but he just looked away from me. "Tell me now Kean, who is it? Is it Daniel or Me? I'm not letting you choose, I just wanted to clarify you so that you won't have to confuse yourself." As soon as calms himself down, I managed to put my arm around his shoulders and guided him on a bench. He really looks so pitiful right now. This makes my heart really sank down towards the deepest hole no one can never escape. "Li, it will always be you. I won't have to change my mind to anybody else and even Daniel can't replace you or take away me from you. Always remember that all of me is yours already and I am giving myself selflessly to you. It won't change as long as I love you."

I knelt down in front of him and held his hands together. His hands are shaking violently. "Li, please. I'm begging you. Never ever have any doubt in me again because you're all I have." He grips them as hard as he can, not letting them loose. I can feel confidence and trust in his touch, more likely he's grown into them already.

"Kean, I know that. I've to make sure that you are serious of everything we're doing. I know how much you care about Daniel, and there's nothing I can do about it. Yet, you must understand your place in that relationship." His words are strumming in my ears like some sort of magic. It chills me to the bones. It definitely reminded me of how I still feel for Daniel. It keeps me from telling Li of I love Daniel more than I feel for him. I  guess I'm such a good liar, knowing if I do that I'm gonna hurt the person who considered me his for such a long time.