BBC Sherlock Imagines

Mycroft: Drunk On A Plane

Request for Charlotte_Moriarty

(I believe your exact words were "A scene where Mycroft is drunk is all I want in life")

~

"How does the plane fly?"

"With it's wings."

"Well where are the feathers?" Mycroft asked, bubbling with laughter. You shook your head and rubbed your temples. You had been in the air for barely an hour and somehow Mycroft had managed to down multiple shots of vodka in that short time. He had also managed to become the most annoying person in the world. A flight attendant walked by and he reached out across you, tugging on the bottom of her nicely pleated shirt like a small child.

"Miss, miss," he called out. The lady looked down on him, a strange look decorating her features.

"How can I help you?" she asked, giving you an odd glance, a sort of call for help.

"Where's the bathroom? I think I have to... Well you know." He hiccuped a little and chuckled. You blushed deeply, feeling the second hand embarrassment - you didn't thing it was quite often that a grown man admitted to a stranger they had to go to the bathroom, let alone be too immature to actually say it. You motioned her down to your level so you could speak on his behalf.

"I'm sorry, he's a little... Out of it right now, to say the least." She nodded understandingly.

"Just down the aisle, first door on the left."

"Thank you," you replied kindly. You turned around to grab Mycroft, but paused when you saw him. He was kneeling on his seat, peering over the back of his seat at a little boy. The boy looked to be laughing hysterically while Mycroft was fuming.

"If you kick my seat again I will have the British government arrest you and you will be taken to prison for 2 years!" The boy continued laughing, and kicking the chair. "Or you will be forced to fake your death and be sent undercover to a foreign country where you'll spend your life wearing away piece by piece in a torture chamber hanging by your thumbs! With no cookies and milk or bedtime stories before bed!" The boy, who appeared to only be about 7 years old, burst into tears.

"Mycroft!" you scolded. He turned to you, a childishly defensive look on his face.

"What? I'm just warning a future juvenile delinquent here about what happens if you kick the King of England's seat!"

"You're not the King of England," you replied flatly, though the fact that he had said that made you laugh a little.

"Of course I am. Why do you think I am always at Buckingham Palace?"

"Because you work for the Queen of England."

"More like the old hag works for me," he huffed, sticking his nose up in the air.

"Mycroft Holmes, I'm taking you to the bathroom so hopefully you can piss out the 5 gallons of alcohol you've had and sober up a little."

"Yes mum," he replied glumly. You rolled your eyes, but decided to ignore him. No point in trying to argue with the princess, excuse me, "King".

He staggered to his feet, his body swaying from side to side. You grabbed his arm to help him get situated so he could walk, but he ripped his arm from your grasp. You just shrugged your shoulders and started walking slowly down the aisle. You checked every couple seconds to make sure he was still behind you, walking steady. Finally you made it to the door of the bathroom, but just your luck, it was in use.

"Bloody hell," said Mycroft, finally making it, "are they going to the bathroom in there?" He was slightly out of breath and he still swayed from side to side just standing still.

"No, they went for a shopping spree," you replied sarcastically.

"You mean there's a mall on this thing?" he announced. His jaw fell open and he continued to look at you with a look of disbelief, surprise, and amazement. "Wow, these electric birds really do have everything," he said in awe, inspecting everywhere around him. Finally the person exited the bathroom. It was a mom and her daughter. Mycroft's jaw dropped again in amazement.

"(Y/n), (y/n)!" he said excitedly. "Two people can fit in this?" He inspected the inside carefully, then stepped inside. When he turned around, he motioned for you to come and join him. He couldn't even stand up straight, let alone stretch his arms out.

"Mycroft, no."

"C'mon (y/n), if those two people can fit in here then we can fit in here. It will be fun!" You were pretty sure the whole plane could hear you two.

"I think you can go to the bathroom on your own."

"This is a bathroom? I thought you said it was a shopping mall!" And with that you closed the door on Mycroft, sealing him and all his drunken glory in the 3x3 "electric bird" bathroom. Minutes passed. Then more minutes. Then more. You had been scrolling aimlessly down Pinterest, looking at home decor, when the flight attendant from earlier came up to you.

"Is he okay in there?" You were confused for a second, having forgot why you were standing in front of the bathroom on a plane. Mycroft.

"Oh wow, he's been in there for 20 minutes." Part of you was worried, but the other part found this hysterical. You tried to open the door, but the bugger had locked it. "He can't walk a straight line, but somehow he managed to lock the door?" you grumbled. The flight attendant left, but returned momentarily with keys. She unlocked the door, but didn't open it.

"Maybe you should open it. Just in case he's, uh, revealed." You nodded in agreement. You cracked open the door and peeked your head inside, scared of what you might find. You heard snoring first, then poked your head in further to find Mycroft passed out. He was fully clothed, thankfully, and was sitting on the toilet lid. His head was laid back against the wall and his legs were cramped in between the toilet and the sink. You laughed, then snapped a picture. It would be useful in later times.

"Should we wake him up?" asked the flight attendant from behind your shoulder. Mycroft's suit and tie were wrinkled, and a drop of drool was pooling on the edge of his mouth.

"No leave him, it's only right the King of England sleeps on a royal throne."

A/N

Heyo famo

THANK YOU ALL FOR 140k+ reads!!! You guys amaze me. So much love for you all. Thank you thank you. I can't believe I've been writing these for 10 MONTHS. So much has happened in that time. And I've gotten to talk to and get to know so many of you!

So I'm still working on a string of requests. I will do all of them!!! (I'm saying the same thing about all of my homework in these last weeks)

Hopefully I will get to write sometime during this week.

Only one more week of track and then I have more time after school!

Watched the new Captain America last night! So good! (I love that Martin was in it)

Random: If your life was made into a movie what would it be called?

Alright momma has to get back to work.

Night kiddos.

Stay groovy.

P.S.
#sherpressionSUCKS