BBC Sherlock Imagines

Moriarty: Fight Club

Request for fangirlwriters

~

You awoke to slamming doors, stomping footsteps, and not so quiet giggles. Girl giggles to be exact, and not your own. You checked the clock - 2 in the morning. It was quiet for a few moments, and you were sure you had imagined the giggles, but then another fit came along.

"Oh Jim, you're so fffuunny," fawned a high pitched voice.

"Nooo babe, you're funny." Babe? I'm his babe.

"Nooo, you!" squeaked the voice again. You ripped off the covers and stomped out to the living room. In there, stood a very drunk Jim, his arm slung around a very trashy, and also drunk, girl.

"What the hell?" you yelled, bringing the two drunkards attention to you. "Who are you?" you asked the girl. Her skirt rose up too high, and her shirt sunk too low. She looked like a clown threw up on her face, and her hair gave off the appearance of having not been washed in a week. "Actually, I don't really care who you are, just get the hell out of here." She giggled at your threat.

"Jim, you didn't tell meh you lived with your mooomm."

"I didn't know I did either!" They snickered at the "joke", which you did not find funny at all. You were not his mom, you were his seriously pissed off girlfriend. "Okay Glenda, maybe you should go, my girlfriend is a liiiitle bit  mad I think." He accentuated the word "little" in his falsetto voice, an attribute you usually found very amusing, but now just pissed you off more.

"What girlfriend?" you shot back. His eyes suddenly changed, sobriety finding its way back into his system at your ice cold attack. He sighed, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

"You breathe cuuute," fawned Glenda The Whore. His eyes remained shut as annoyance painted over his features.

"Glenda, leave." She giggled dumbly, thinking it was a joke. He opened his eyes, expecting her to be gone, but instead still found her giggly and looking up at him like he was a god.
"Glenda out."

"But Jiiiiiiimmm," she whined. He took her by the shoulders, you felt your insides explode in anger, and steered her out the door, shutting it behind her and locking it. Slowly, he turned to you.

"Honey I'm home," he sing songed jokingly. You didn't move, just glared, but that was enough for his laugh to fade.

"Three strikes Jim. You know what that means - you're out." This was the third time he had brought home a girl. The first time was a joke, one you did not find funny, and the second time was a stripper from a bachelor party he attended. That one had tried to crawl into bed next to you and fall asleep; harmless, but still annoying, gross, and a little creepy.

"Please (y/n), I'm sorry. It won't happen again." You shook your head.

"You disgust me Jim Moriarty, you really do. I give you chance after chance after chance and you blow every one of them. You claim that you're sorry, but if you really were you wouldn't do it again. Now get out."

"I'm not leaving (y/n), I love you."

"Get out before I shoot you."

"You won't shoot me, you love me."

"I love a lot of things, things that don't try to cheat on me and bring girls home, things that take me seriously when I say this is the last chance they have. You are NOT one of those things."

"I can change (y/n), I can. I was only bringing home that girl because she said she knew how to cook and I hired her to make you some good food, like your own personal chef."

"The only thing she knows how to make is me throw up. Now I said get out, so GET OUT. And don't make me say it again or I swear to the Lord Almi-" Out of nowhere, he lunged towards you and cradled your face with his two hands, then kissed you with all his might. The kiss spoke for itself - you felt the "I'm sorry" and "I love you". But you weren't stupid, you knew he would do it again, and that's what caused you do what you did next - break the kiss, kick him in the balls, push him out the door, and lock him out.

A/N

First and only order of business: Shall I make a part 2 for this? If I do it will be up after I finish some other requests.

Moriarty ones are always fun to write, I feel like I get to go a little crazy with them!

So many of you sent in requests and I'm so happy you did! I love hearing your folks' brilliant ideas and just knowing that you all want me to write for you. I feel so special - thank you for that. I am trying my best to post as much as I can, but life is a little crazy right now. As soon as it calms down a little and my weekends are a little more free, I will deliver you all some awesome pieces of work in a short amount of time. Until then, I hope you all can work with me here. Together we can get through this Sherpression.

Speaking of:

This hiatus is horrible.
Everything I hear in school reminds me of Sherlock.
It's very Sherpressing.
I want nothing more than to lay in bed all day and write write write. And watch reruns.

Again, I just want to thank you all for the reads (I'm at 5K and I had a mini heart attack when I saw), the comments, the votes, and just you guys. You all are awesome and make me love writing these. At first, this was just for my own leisure to help cope with the hiatus, but now I do for it you guys too.

(Wow I'm getting touchy feely)

Anyways

Enjoy life
Enjoy school (or at least try to)
Enjoy my writing

And more importantly

just go with the flow (like a jellyfish)