Crimson Happiness (jisbon one shots)

After red johns rules episode

Teresa Lisbon

"Lisbon!!!!!" the handsome blonde calls as he swings himself round my office door, armed with his trademark cup of tea. His eyes are wide and his chest rises and falls rapidly as he looks around for me desperately.The moment he claps eyes on me, our eyes meet and I can see him exhale, the worries lining his forehead, slowly easing out. He closes his eyes as if in sheer relief. I pretend I don't understand what he's doing, but I know what he's doing.

Ever since he received the cd from red John, Jane has followed me around. Instead of being too worried myself, i had to admit, it warmed me from the inside out to know that in the last few years, the happiest memory he had, was of me! But this was getting to be too much! Jane was not his usual happy, playful self anymore. There was constantly a line between his brows and even while he dozed on his favourite couch, he shook and mumbled in his sleep, tormented by demons I could not see. I missed him.

I missed the Patrick Jane who took me by surprise to cuddle me, when I was down or stressed. I missed the Patrick Jane, who I could constantly banter back and forth with. I missed the Patrick Jane, who could take my breath away, just by flashing me that beautiful smile of his. My chest tightens as I realise just how much I miss him. I open my eyes to see him watching me intently, as if trying to memorise every detail of my face. I am tired of this. I walk up to him, right up, till our chests are touching. I place my hands on his shoulders, and look into his beautiful eyes, ignoring the surprised look on his face. "I want my best friend back." I tell him. "I want him and I want him now!" something in those dazzling blue eyes, filled with such intensity and heartbreaking sadness, moves and he looks a little more like himself, less like a ghost. I march away, because I know I have gotten my message across. I chastise myself for letting my thoughts jump out of my mouth like that. Best friend? Is that all he is to me?

I push these thoughts away anxiously. I nearly bump into van pelt in my state of mind. "hey boss!" she says. "are you okay?". "yeah, yeah, sorry!" I say sheepishly. "any development on the case?". "yeah, I was running a triple six on the victims skull, you know just proceidure, and it turns out se isn't really the daughter of the chairman!" van pelt finishes proudly. I praise her fondly, knowing how much it means to her. She would go far in life, that one. I smile as I check my phone and there is one from Walter Mashburn, my old flame. "hey beautiful" it reads. "fancy a spin on the helicopter?".

Normally id love to go, but of late, whenever I lay in bed it is not his face I see in my mind, before I fall asleep. The face I see is cheeky and more like an angels than a humans. He has soft golden curls and eyes that are so beautiful they make me want to cry. Jane. I smile involuntarily, then I jump about a feet in the air as a voice whispers in my neck, "will you go?". "Ahh!" I shriek grabbing wildly at something to keep me from losing my balance. Unfortunately that thing happens to be Jane. A smiling Jane whose arms wrap around me as he steadies me. He looks more like my Jane now, sweet and childlike. "Are you going?" he asks again. His attitude is blasé enough but I can't help but notice how his hands tighten around my body as he waits for the reply. "no" I say. "I don't think I will". His hands relax at my side and he says simply "ha! poor Mashburn! you really should go, you know!" he adds unwillingly. I push away from his chest, resenting myself for it, my body screaming at the withdrawal of Janes soft, warm embrace. "maybe I will".

The words jump out before I even realise that I am the one who has spoken them. I realise that I want to know how Jane will react. "You should!" he says smiling. a normal observer would not have been able to see through his perfect lie. But I can. I notice how his smile doesn't reach his brilliant blue eyes and I have my answer. Jane feels the same way I did when lorelei martins informed me that she and Jane were lovers. Like someone had hit me in the stomach with a ton of bricks. Like someone had stabbed me a million times. It was a raw itching. Something you hated but couldn't change. I smile at him sweetly, turn on my heel and stride away.