17 Things I Found In Your Bedroom

Chapter 3 Part 2

The ceiling. It's a beautiful place- stable, secure, plain. It has one job; to stay up, and then the rest is done by the roof tiles above it.

The wall got boring.

I shut my eyes tight and open them again, before propping myself up on my elbows on the bed. The duvet is lying in a mess on the floor, kicked curtesy of me, and light streams through the gap in the drawn curtains.

Rubbing my eyes, I collapse back down onto the pillow. I haven't been to school in two weeks now, and I haven't talked to Carli since I yelled at her about him.

Ace has been all I can think about these last few days. Before that, I wasn't thinking at all. That's probably why I was yelling at Carli, and why it hit me so hard.

Mum said I should see a psychiatrist. She's right, but I don't want to. Not even Carli can understand what's going on in my head, and we've been close since primary school. I use to like to think she would be my best friend forever, but at the moment I don't know.

The clock is currently reading 17:37. My sleep patterns have changed a bit...

The familiar sound of my ringtone fills the room, and I stare up at the ceiling for a minute before turning on my side to face the bedside table where it lies.

It's Wynter, my other friend from school. I haven't heard from her once since Ace died. Carli's called every now and then, but Wynter and I were never as close as Carli and I, and it's showing. She wasn't close to Ace either. We hung out all the time, though, and I would count her as one of the best people in my life. She just doesn't know anything important about me, and vice versa. We have a kind of 'inside jokes' friendship, where everything we say to each other is pointless, but it's how we bonded, and we always used to have a laugh.

"Hi." I mutter into the receiver.

"Hey, Claire." She replies softly, so quiet I can barely hear her. "I'm really sorry I haven't called or anything." She adds genuinely. I cough slightly.

"It's fine." I state bluntly. I'm not mad at her; I just don't really want to talk to her.

"No, Claire. No, it's not fine. Ace... I should've been there for you, and I wasn't. And then today I was scrolling through my camera roll and I found those photos of us at Tia's a few weeks ago, and I just... I'm so, so sorry." Wynter sounds defeated, and my heart dips a little. The amount of times I've heard 'I'm sorry' from people, when really they should be saying that to his grave. When they bury him, that is.

"I've had mum, it's been okay. And Carli too." I lean against the wall next to my bed and pull my knees up to my chest. Opposite me is a small mirror on the other wall, and I look like shit. Like, complete shit. My hair is knotty and in a messy bun which is falling out at the back, and I'm wearing an old hoodie and leggings. There are bags under my eyes not even make up could cover up, and my lips are cracked and dry.

"Do you want to do something today? We could go to Tia's for ice cream or something." She offers, perking up at the idea. My shoulders slouch; last time I was in Tia's, Ace was with me. Before that, he was busking right outside the window.

"Sorry, Wynter. I... I don't think that's such a good idea." I utter, looking down at my lap. Wynter sighs.

"Oh, okay, um, how about I come over and we can glam you up a little? You probably look like crap." I let out a fake chuckle.

"Wow, thanks."

"Mmhmm. I'll be over in ten." Before I can argue, she hangs up on me. I stare at the phone for a second, then drop it to my side on the bed.

"And now Izzy is out with Daniel. They broke up last week because he wore white vans, so she started calling him 'Damn Daniel', and then his friends started calling him that, and he got pretty annoyed. So, yeah, now they're back together again because Charlotte told Vic that Izzy went to a party and nearly hooked up with Kyle, then Vic told Ruben who told Daniel, and then apparently he went to Riley, but he said to tell Izzy about that thing that happened last month, so he did but Izzy was pissed and so she went out and got really drunk with Lorraine-" Wynter pauses. "Sorry, I'm boring you, aren't I?"

"No." I yawn, not moving my head as Wynter plaits it into some intricate design she found on Pinterest. "It's normal. I need normal."

"Well, if you want normal... there's this new guy at school too. His name's Theo. Really chilled, leather jacket, black jeans. Motorcycle. The whole thing. But he's the year above us, which is totally annoying. You know my mum has that rule about me not dating older guys. It's stupid, I mean, surely they're better than the younger ones; they've got more experience in the outside world."

"And they're now legal to drink in public. In fact, they're legal in general." I point out. Wynter tugs on my hair slightly. "Uh, Ow?"

"You're not meant to side with my mother, Claire! Jesus, you would think my best friend would have my back with something like this- especially since the last time I actually liked anyone was three years ago, with Max Henworth."

"Oh my God, I remember him! With the bushy afro and glasses!" I exclaim, knowing I'll piss her off. She walks over in front of me and glares.

"Okay, one, I was fourteen. Two, he left anyway. And three," she pauses and twirls a piece of her hair in her hand. "His glasses were kinda cute..."

"Oooo, Wynter and Max, sitting in a tree," Wynter shoves her palms over her ears and starts singing 'la la la' very loudly whilst pacing the room. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" I shout, before we both burst out laughing.

"We're seriously too old for this." She mutters, shaking her head once we'd calmed down.

"Eh, but you love it." she walks over to the bed and sits down next to me. We sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes, before she places her hand on my back.

"I'm so sorry." She starts. I shake my head and look up at her sadly, but she holds a finger to my face, signing me to shut up. "About Ace, and not being there and stuff. I know I said it on the phone, but it's more than just words over a receiver. And if it makes any contribution, Ace was awesome. Everyone's missing him back at school, even the people who didn't know him." I feel the tears start in my eyes again. I was distracted for a while there. "Oh, God, I'm sorry." Wynter's arms come around my shoulders, and she pushes her brown hair over her other shoulder so it's not in my face.

I don't say anything in response, because I know it won't be okay.

And Wynter doesn't say anything to push me, because she knows it too.

tic.co�Γ

Thanks for reading!

Song: Lego House cover, VIGR (Brad Kavanagh)