The guitar feels heavy in my hands. It never used to be this heavy.
The scissors grasped in my other fingers are shaking. This is not something I ever want to have to do. It feels like destroying even more of Ace- and he's not here anymore anyway.
I'm sitting in Ace's bedroom, the blinds pulled closed, on the bed. It's dark outside now, the moon to high up in the sky to be visible from my window.
After I read the second diary entry, I just sat on the floor near the stream for a while longer, until the sun started to dive down behind the sea, contemplating what the next item would be.
I came up with a lot of ideas, but none of them seemed realistic. In the end, I was just winding myself up with thoughts that I knew would never happen, so I left the clearing and headed back to Ace's house. His mum's car was gone from the driveway, so I just went through the window again. The blinds were closed this time, and I don't remember if it was me or not, so I just pushed them aside and grabbed the guitar from the floor and the scissors coincidently placed behind them.
Like he planned it.
I raise the deadly blades in my hand and squeeze my eyes shut after I angle them over one of the guitar strings and without another thought, break the instrument.
*Flashback*
"No, that's G, not A." Ace shook his head at me as I once again moved my fingers to a different string of the guitar. He sighed. "F."
"Okay, I'm not getting this at all." I stated, handing the instrument back over to him. Ace just placed it on the other side of him, on the wall and chuckled.
"It takes a while, Claire."
"You've been trying to teach me to play a chord for the past hour. An hour! One chord! Surely that's not normal."
"Everyone has-"
"-Different learning paces, I know." A smile played on my lips as Ace face-planted my shoulder in frustration. "But I'm no good at it, like, at all." Ace lifted his head from my shoulder and wrapped his arms around it instead.
"You'll get it soon." He picked up the guitar again and placed it in his lap, plucking at the strings one by one. "Look; A,B,C,D,E,F,G. There is no H, you just go back to A. For a chord, you just play a set of notes together, like this," he positioned the guitar in his arms; continuing to play three notes together.
"Why don't you just play, and I'll sleep or something." I suggested. He sighed. I turned around on the wall we were sitting on. It was an old, grey stone one bordering the edge of the harbour. Previously, we were facing the water, but when I spun round, I was facing the promenade and the bustling crowds with tourists and locals alike.
A few seconds later, Ace turned as well so he was facing the same way. I moved further into his side, resting my head on his chest while his arm wrapped around my upper back.
"Let's do something this weekend." I started. "It's your birthday, and you've been away a lot lately; I feel like I haven't seen much of you this past week." It was true- Ace had been hanging around at revision sessions and random meetings after school for a while. I'd tried to get him to tell me what he was doing, but he only said he had some coursework to catch up on before finals.
"You're with me right now." Ace chuckled. I shook my head. "Okay, okay. What do you want to do?"
"It's your birthday, you pick." I shrugged. Ace was silent for a good minute.
"Surprise me." he eventually concluded. Thinking of something to do for Ace's birthday was hard, but I decided on one thing: it was going to be the best birthday ever. Something to remember me by if we ever got lost on the path we call life.
*Flashback Over*
Hesitantly, I reach my shaking hand into the body of the guitar. It's hollow, but somehow it feels weird. I reach the bottom, but feel nothing. Maybe Ace forgot to put the item in, or maybe he was messing with my head; making me break his most prized possession.
When I pull my fingers back out again, tiny pieces of dry, green grass fall to the ground next to me. I run my thumb over my fingers which are lightly dusted with forest green dust as well.
Suddenly, something clicks in my mind. It shouldn't have taken me so long to figure out what the next item would be. Ace practically told me in that last diary entry.
Without thinking anymore, I reach back into the guitar and pull out the tiny zip-lock bag of weed, some in clumps, some formed into powder and now sitting at the bottom.
I place the bag in my palm and fist my hand around it breathing through the anger, although I'm not sure who I'm angry at. Maybe Berty, maybe Ace or maybe Joseph. Or me, for not figuring it out sooner.
I decide not to read anymore of the diary that night. It's Sunday tomorrow, and I want to try and get a good night's sleep so I don't look like a walking zombie at school on Monday. It takes a while to drift off into unconsciousness with the thoughts of Ace's suicide, and what caused it fresh on my mind. But these thoughts are only confluences into the main stream question in my mind; what's next?
Okay, so I know it's short, but the last and the next chapter are gonna be long ones. Thank you for reading and have a great day/night!
Song: Brad Kavanagh's cover of 'She Looks So Perfect'
YOU ARE READING
17 Things I Found In Your Bedroom
General FictionAce used to be a regular busker with his guitar and top hat on the streets bordering a beach in England. To the naked eye, he was a happy eighteen year old student enjoying life the way it should be enjoyed. But there were secrets under the happy, m...