Beyond

---

We spent a week together before things went back to the way they were. I woke up with him in my bed and fell asleep with him in it. It was bliss. It was beautiful and perfect and I loved it, adored it.

But then the week was up and he started taking those business calls again. Again, it was money and hoes over me.

"You leaving?" I ask, getting up and walking over to him. It was okay. I had class today anyway. I couldn't stay in bed even if I wanted to. I just wanted him to stay there and not leave so I knew he wasn't doing anything bad.

"Yeah. Jeremiah need me out there."

"What time are you coming back?" I ask, fidgeting with my hands. I was nervous and anxious. I didn't want things to go right back to the way they were. I was tired of being spiteful and hurt. I wanted Jabari to be with me and only me. I wanted to be the only one who had him.

"I'ont know babe." He says, turning around and taking me into his arms. He must've heard the nervousness in my voice. "Later tonight tho."

"You sure?"

"Yes, Iris, I'm sure. I'll be here when you fall asleep babe."

I sigh. "Okay." I groan, pulling away. It had to end sometimes. Nothing with Jabari ever lasted. I don't know why I let it enter my mind that we were gonna stay the same forever.

I wish it did. He was my heart but he wasn't the most trustworthy of niggas. I shouldn't have expected him to drop both money and hoes just because we spent a week together. That wasn't how it worked in Jabari's world. We weren't ever playing by my rules, they were by his and I allowed that.

"Don't look so worried, Iris. I love you."

"I know and I love you too." I say, sighing deeply. "But you also love clubs and money and hoes-"

"But not enough to lose my wife." He says.

Such beautiful lies I will believe. And it's not that I want to believe him, I need to. If not, then my whole world would just... I don't know. Things wouldn't be right. My heart would break. I wouldn't be able to handle it, especially after he promised me no more cheating.

"Good."

--

True to his word, Jabari was back in my apartment, in my bed when I woke up. I didn't know what time he came in, but at least he was here. That's all that mattered, right?

"What time did you get in babe?" I asked as I got up. Guess I would be cooking breakfast for two today.

That's how I liked it.

"I don't even know." He mumbles, shifting to lay on his stomach.

"Are you hungry, baby?"

"Iris, lay back down with me." He says, patting the spot next to him.

"Jabari-"

"Baby." He whines, making me roll my eyes but smile. I missed this so much. I missed him.

I go back, getting under the covers and laying next to him. He turns on his side and wrap his arms around me, pulling me in close. It felt so safe, so comfortable. I close my eyes slowly and let out a contempt sigh.

"I love you so much Iris."

"I love you too baby." I respond, opening my eyes and kissing his chin.

"... I'm sorry." He hesitates.

"It's okay dummy." I say, a small smile on my lips. "I'm glad you came back to your senses."

"Mmm." He hums and I close my eyes again.