Beyond

-----

I let out a sigh, lying back in Seb's bed. I needed to get Jabari out of my mind. I just... I needed to know what he put on instagram. But I didn't want to seem weak or make it seem like he meant something to me. It didn't matter. He didn't matter.

I quickly unlock my phone, going to instagram quickly and clicking on the name that popped up so frequently in my notifications. Damn near every picture I posted he liked it. It could have been trees, my hand, my eyes, he'd like it. Just as long as it didn't have Seb in it. If there was a hate button, he'd press it so fast and so intensely.

I tap the video in his profile, letting the sound play. I was a little ashamed of myself. It took me a week to break and see what he was gonna show me.

"This... is my wife's name." He starts as the video plays, showing his chest.

He got my name tattooed on his chest. "Oh my God." I mutter.

"And this..." He pulls out a jewelry box. On that looked like it fit a ring.

Oh my God.

"... is for her when she forgives me and finally comes back to me." He opens the box, showing the world the most beautiful ring that I've ever seen. An engagement ring.

"I love that girl man." He says, showing his face and a small smirk. The video stops after that and I close my eyes.

He's stupid. I hate him. Why? Why would he do this, why would he post that? Why can't he just leave me alone? I was done with him, why can't he be done with me?

I just wanted him to leave me alone.

I let out a deep breath, wiping my face before Sebastian walked in. He would want to know why I was crying and would ask questions. I wouldn't be able to tell him that I was lurking all on Jabari's page, noticed that he'd deleted all the pictures of him in the club, with bottles and other girls and replaced them with pictures of just him or me or both of us.

This is why I didn't want to see what he had on instagram. I wasn't able to handle it.

I wanted it to stop. Why can't he just let that chapter in our lives end?

-

"You seem to be out of it, dear, what's wrong?"

I snap out of my slight trance to turn to Sebastian. "Huh?"

"See, look. What is wrong, Iris?" He asks. I smirk a bit shaking my head.

"I'm sexually frustrated, Seb."

"Oh God Iris." He laughs, making me roll my eyes.I was only half serious, so... yeah. There was no way I was going to tell him I was tripping because Jabari. No fucking way. "Chill."

"I'm serious Seb." I pout, crossing my arms. "We haven't done it once. I haven't even seen you naked!"

"It's only been five months, Iris."

"Well, you said you loved me already. Why can't we take it a step further?"

"I'm just not ready for it."

"Sure Sebastian." I huff while rolling my eyes. "You know, Jabari waited-" I cut myself off, my eyes widening. Sebastian looks over at me, an eyebrow raised and I shake my head. "Sorry."

"It's fine, Iris. I'm not Jabari and I'm not any other boy you've been with. I want you to meet my family and have the key to my place. I want us to be fully established and in love before we make that step."

"Sebastian, we can do all of that. We are fully established and in love. Or at least, I am."

"You're only saying that because you want to have sex."

"And because I want to do all of that. I want to meet your mom and dad and all of your siblings. I want the key to your place. Sebastian, I want everything you have to give me."

Sebastian shows me a wide and excited smile. "Let's go meet my parents."

"When?"

"Tomorrow!" He says excitedly. "I really want you to meet them, Iris. They'll love you."

"Really?"

I've never met anyone's parents after I've been with them for a while. I met Jabari's mother and brothers while me and him were still friends and then built on that relationship with them after we've gotten together.

Me and Sebastian didn't really have much time being friends. When we bumped into each other after my math class, we were attracted to each other and exchanged numbers purely to get together in a romantic sense with his thinly veiled excuse being his love for taking pictures and wanting me to model.

We went out on at least seven dates before he asked me to officially be his girl and I agreed. Even though Seb is a great guy and he is my closest friend, but we weren't friends from the start. Maybe that's why Jabari and I's love was so strong. We met in high school and were friends for a minute before we even started talking.

"Yes, really Iris." Sebastian laughs. "I've told my mom about you before."

"Aw, you talk about me?"

"Of course I do baby."

-

"Sebastian!" His mother coos, pulling him in for a tight, eyes closed hug. Behind him, I fidget slightly. I was a little nervous. Like I said, I've never been in this position.

So, I played with the hem of my dress a little while they hugged. Since her eyes are tightly shut in order to appreciate the hug more, I guess, she hasn't seen me. I wonder how she's going to react. Would she think I'm ugly? Or unfit for her son? Or have a big nose.

I touch my nose a bit. I mean, it was a little big. I used to get teased about it a lot, but it really fits my face. To me I was beautiful and Seb seemed to think so as well.

His mother finally pulls away with a sigh. "Come in, come..." Her eyes fall on me and the words die in her throat, making me blink. Was something wrong? Did I have something on my face?

"This... is Iris?" She asks turning her weird look over to Sebastian who was just as confused as I was.

"Yes." Sebastian says slowly, turning to me and wrapping his arm around me, bringing me forward, which wasn't what I wanted. "This is Iris."

"Oh..." She says, glancing back at me. "Well, uh, come in."

I follow Sebastian into the house, still confused as fuck. Why did she react like that? Did I look weird? Was I smiling too hard? Was I too awkward? What did I do wrong? Was my dress ugly?

I look down to check. No, I looked great in this dress. I made sure of it? So what was I doing wrong?