Big Brother Barakat (Jalex)

Hometown Heroes; National Nobodies (Alex's POV)

It was nearing June, and it had been five months since I had seen Jack, but to me, it felt like an eternity. He wrote me nearly every week, sometimes twice a week, telling me how excited he was to be graduating soon. I was excited too, but the months seemed to drag on and on. Soon, the letters from Jack stopped, the texts on the phone he gave me stopped, and our calls to each other had stopped.

My good moods stopped.

Jack was the source of my happiness, and after all ties to him seemed to be cut, I had fallen back into my old ways. Day after day, I'd lock myself in my room, barely seeing anybody for weeks at a time. It was stupid to let someone who lived hundreds of miles away control my life, but I had come to depend on Jack, I had come to trust him, and most of all, I had come to love him. Jack Barakat was someone I loved, someone I depended on to take all of my pain away. Stupid, maybe, but a mistake? At this point, I was sure it was one. I was terrified from the very beginning that he would walk out of my life, and now that he did, I was certain my life would never be normal again.

-

It was now July, and although I tried to get my life back on track, I just couldn't. I was slipping deeper and deeper into my depression with almost every passing day. I wanted to blame Jack for everything, I wanted to call him and scream at him, even if he didn't answer. I wanted to tell him how much he hurt me, and I wanted to ask him how he had the nerve to just up and leave me like he did. I wanted to tell him that I fucking hated his guts and that I never wanted to speak to him again.

But, I couldn't.

I wouldn't dare let myself do that to him, or to myself. As much as I despised his very existence with almost every passing day, I still loved him, and although I hadn't heard from him, I assumed he still loved me too. I knew that if I ever saw him again, I wouldn't be able to stop myself from wrapping my arms around him, even if I felt like I hated him.

-

As the first week in July came and went, the phone slowly started buzzing almost every day. I glanced at the messages on it, and they were all from someone I've never heard of before. I vaguely recognized the name, but I knew I had never met someone with the name of Zack. I remembered Jack had told me about a friend of his named Zack, but I wondered how he had gotten my number.

-

'Alex, this is Jack's friend Zack. I know we've never met, but you need to know what's been going on.'

'Jack's dad has always been a pretty typical dad, but he's also always been pretty tough on Jack. I don't know if you ever met his mom, but she's the total opposite. She's super supportive of Jack and in everything he does. His dad's not really the same way.'

'I know Jack hasn't been talking to you for a couple months now, and you really need to know why. Jack's been trying to plan a trip back out by you to see you again. His mom's totally on board, but his dad didn't really like the idea at all. Jack would book a flight to see you, and somehow his dad would get on his laptop and cancel the tickets. His dad's been sabotaging your's and Jack's relationship because he doesn't want to accept the fact that his son is gay. I don't know if Jack told you he is or not, but it was kind of hard not to figure it out, especially with everything he told us he told you.'

'Anyway, so Jack's dad initially had a major freakout and forced all ties to you be cut. He made Jack delete your number and stop sending you letters. He basically threatened him and will not let him have any contact with you anymore. His mom had had enough of all this, so they're actually in the middle of a divorce, and it's supposed to be finalized sometime this week. Alex, Jack is so sorry about everything. He knows you're upset and probably not happy with him at all, but he wanted you to know that he's alright and that he'll see you soon. He still loves you and he hopes that you two can work all this out. Just hold on tight and you'll see him soon. Don't be too hard on the kid, he's had a rough couple of months.'

-

I was nearly crying at the end of the texts I received from Zack. I missed Jack so much, and to know that he was going through all of this alone, it hurt me and made me feel terrible that I had even thought about lashing out at him. Of course he wouldn't blame me for being upset with him, but I know he probably needed a shoulder to lean on more than I did.

I laid back on my bed, clutching the phone to my chest tightly. I wondered when I would see Jack again, considering Zack kept saying it would be soon. I wondered how soon 'soon' was, though. Would it be tomorrow? Next week? Next month? I wasn't sure, but all I knew is that however long it took, I'd be willing to wait.

-

I jumped at the feeling of the phone buzzing in my hands. I unlocked it and read another text I had gotten. 'Do you miss Jack?'

Without any hesitation, I began to reply back. 'Of course I do. Jack was the first person I ever trusted in my life, and I have no doubt he'll be the last. Sure I'm upset with him, but I know he's having a rough time in his life right now, so I'll get over it. Jack is an incredibly special person in my life. He's helped me realize that I can trust people, I can rely on people, I can count on people. He's helped me realize so many more things, like my sexuality, my feelings, my everything. Jack is unlike anyone I've ever met before. I love him with all of my heart, and I cannot wait to see him again.'

'You know, you don't have to wait too long.'

'Why?'

-

My body jumped at the sound of my doorknob jiggling. Before I could even get off of my bed to slam the door shut, thinking it might have been one of my housemates trying to bother me again, the door flew open. I stood in the doorway, staring at the tall figure in the hallway. There was a bag slung over his shoulder, and he looked out of breath. Before my brain registered who it was, my eyes instantly recognized him.

Without any warning, I ran to Jack and wrapped my arms around him. I started crying into his shoulder, and he did the same to me. I refused to let go; my hands gripped his jacket so tight I thought they might break. I kept rambling on through my tears, telling him how much I missed him, how sorry I was about everything he was going through. He laughed a little, telling me it wasn't my fault.

When we finally let go of each other, we sat on the edge of my bed. We didn't say much else to each other, but we each had smiles on our faces. Jack's bag was now on the floor in the middle of my room, and my door was closed again. Our hands were intertwined, and it felt like electricity was running through my arm. I missed Jack, and I missed touching him. 

"Alex, look, I'm so sorry about everything. I still wrote to you every week, I just couldn't send the letters. I brought them all with me, and I thought we could read them together. Or maybe we could read them on the way back home," he began chuckling.

It took me a minute to realize what he had said. "What?" I asked. "I am home, what do you mean?"

He chuckled a little harder, then his facial expression changed. It looked serious, but also had a soft aspect to it. I was worried, but I also felt comforted by it. He began talking to me, this time taking both of my hands into his. His eyes pleaded with mine as he explained everything. He begged me to come home with him, to come live in Baltimore with him and his mom. He said his dad was out of the picture as of yesterday, that he was actually spending time in prison for abuse towards his mom. Jack's eyes welled with tears as he gripped my hands harder. "Please," he said.

I didn't answer him for what seemed like hours, but it was surely only a few minutes. I looked over him, analyzing his posture, his emotions, and his eyes. His eyes never lied to me, and I could tell he wouldn't dare leave here again unless I was with him. Though I was only fifteen, I was certainly old enough to make my own decisions, and I knew everyone else in the house would love to finally see me happy, even my caretakers.

"Jack, I'll come home with you."