The Hawk's Son

Chapter 3: Goodbye

Riza could count the times she felt dread running through her veins. First was when her mother got sick and was rushed to the hospital moments before she died. Next, was when she found out she was going to be sent to live with her father. Third was when she realized she might harbor feelings for one Roy Mustang. And the fourth was when she found out she was going to be a mother.

But none of those things combined compared to the amount of dread she felt when she first heard her child's cries. Nothing could prepare her mentally for the fact that she was now a mother. Nothing could soothe her exhausted mind when she knew that in a few days, she was going to give her child away.

"Riza..." Rebecca said softly as she gave a small squeeze to her hand. "You did it... You really did it." She gave a slight laugh and looked at her friend. "You did it! A boy! It's a boy!"

Riza couldn't return her smile. She felt numb despite the pains from the recent childbirth. Rebecca noticed her expression and her eyes softened. She moved to brush away the hairs that stuck to her sweaty face and smiled at her friend. "Hey... come on, it's all going to be okay..."

Rebecca frowned when Riza gave no response but decided to let it go. She knew it wouldn't be easy. She had tried to get Riza to keep her child, told her that everything would somehow be alright. Riza refused. As a fellow soldier, she understood her friend's actions. Having a child with another soldier would bring a lot of trouble to people like them. Fraternization was forbidden and actually having a child was downright criminal.

Rebecca may not agree with her decision but she was sure the kid would have a better life when she was out of the picture. His existence alone was enough to endanger her life, her friend's life, and Roy's life. He needed to get away from the military. The farther the better. The kid would be safe if he didn't have any connection with his biological parents.

The baby's cries never ceased. Even through the bustle of noise and activity all around her, her mind focused on that cry. She didn't want to. She wanted to forget. She needed an escape. No, her mind coldly whispered, You're afraid... The thought of fear confused her now. She and fear had been acquainted pretty well over the past few months. Yes, she feared. She feared that the military would find out. She feared that Roy would find out. She feared for her life, as well as her friend's.

Fear was not new. She realized that as she thought of her child. Fear wasn't new but it was not a feeling she liked.

Yes. She was afraid. She was afraid of the sudden warmth that blossomed in her chest as the baby's cries became more prominent. She was afraid of seeing her child. She was afraid of holding him in her arms. She was afraid that if she did, she wouldn't be able to let go.

She needed to get away. She needed to escape.

It was too late.

Her pleas went unheard as she felt some sort of movement to her left. Was it her or was the kid's wails getting louder?

"Congratulations, dear. A healthy baby boy."

The happiness in the midwife's voice only felt like cold hands gripping her heart. She had to get away. She had to-

Her inner struggle was cut off when something was placed in her arms. Riza looked at the bundle reluctantly, her entire body shaking. She shouldn't be doing this. This wasn't supposed to happen. Her eyes took in the very small newborn in her eyes, almost hungrily. Her heart surprisingly tightened in concern when she saw the size of the infant. A baby shouldn't be that small, even if it was a newborn.

The baby, as if in its indignation, started flailing its arms blindly and made small noises. Riza realized, with a gut wrenching ache, that the baby had inherited her blonde hair.