[1] Leave Me Lonely

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Katniss POV

I sit on my couch in my apartment alone. I'm always alone now a days, my boyfriend Gale, if you could even call him a boyfriend, is always out with his friends. I'm never invited of course because according to Gale, "it's not practical for a mans girl to come out with him and his friends".

What is this the 1920's? I'm not welcome, not only out with Gale, but I feel like I'm not welcome in his life anymore. He's no good for me.

Every time I try and talk to him he just shuts me down and makes some ridiculous excuse like "I'm busy gardening". He doesn't even have a garden.

He's making me out to be a fool, everyone thinks it and a couple people have said it to me. Not that I give a fuck about what people think but he's hurting me on the inside aswell.

I find myself crying every night because I know he's just out to get away from me. I don't know what I did wrong?

My apartment door opens. Speak of the devil.

"Hi Katniss" Gale says as he sets his backpack down and makes his way to my kitchen.

"Where were you?" I ask as calmly as I can.

"Out? God why do you always need to know where I'm going?" He moans.

"I never ask you where you're going"

"You do Katniss."

"I don't Gale" I mock.

"You know what I'm done with you already, every single day you're just there!"

"This is my apartment!" I snap, my voice raising.

"Whatever. I'm going out"

"Oh going out again! What a shocker!" I say whisky waving my hands about in the air, "You know what, when you walk out that door, don't come back anymore!"

Gale freezes in his place and turns around to face me, "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean you're never with me. You never want to spend time with me. You never ask me how my day was or if I'm feeling okay or-"

"YOU YOU YOU! It's not all about you Katniss!" Gale snaps.

"Well how can it be when you know nothing about me!" I say my anger and my tears rising.

"I do so!"

"You do not! You don't even know my favourite colour!"

"Who the hell would want to know someone's favourite colour? What are we playing fucking rainbows? I know enough about you!" Gale tells me.

I can't believe he just said that. He doesn't even realise what he's said. It just proves he really knows nothing about me.

When I was younger, before my dad died, me and him used to lie in the meadow and even when it didn't rain there used to always be a rainbow. We never knew why, but it was the only thing that just me and my dad did. He used to say it was "our secret place" I was never to show anyone. I even kept it from my sister, Primrose.

"Katniss I can't do this anymore." Gale states.

"Do what? You're never here to do anything anyway" I say back whilst a tear runs down my cheek, "you know what. No. You are not getting to do this to me."

Everyone knows what that "I can't do this anymore" line means and there is no way he's ending it with me. As much as I want him to stay, I can't be this way anymore. I can't live like this.

"It's done Gale. We're done" I state.

Gale laughs a bitter laugh and narrows his eyes, "I didn't know you had it in you Katniss. And what are you going to do now that you've dumped me? Are you going to go lay everyone you can? Get drunk every night? Or find the love of your life?"

I stand still with my arms wrapped around my body protectively, not saying anything, "I've got a news flash for you sweetheart, no one will want you. You know why I go out every night? I go to get away from you. I go because you don't even make an effort. You just sit around like a stupid housewife. As for the love of your life, sorry to break it to you but they don't exist. Even if they did, someone like you wouldn't ever find one"

That's when I snap. I raise my hand and go for Gales cheek but he grabs my hand instead, "Good luck with finding someone to put up with you. Let's face it though, you would probably just sit here and be lonely anyway." He hisses.

I pull my hand and grit my teeth in anger as I snap back, "I'd rather you leave me lonely. Anything is better than another second with you"

With that he throws my apartment key from his keys, against the wall and leaves the apartment, slamming the door shut.

Now that he's gone I can let my barrier down. I fall in my couch and cry and cry and cry. I'm alone.

I'm really alone this time. I don't have the thought in the back of my mind that Gale will come back, even if it was late at night, no one will be coming back.

Gale broke my heart a long time ago and I've finally let myself realise that. It hurts.

It really hurts. I've given up. I've given up on finding my "soulmate".

When I was a teenager I would always be looking out for my soulmate. I couldn't wait to be married. I couldn't wait to have someone tell me they loved me and cared for me.

That's over. I'd rather be lonely than get my heart broken ever again.

I vow it. Never will I be hurt again because I will never let anyone in again.

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A NEW FANFIC

I've got the whole plot planned out for this and trust me it's going to be very exciting!

This is based on Ariana Grande's new album, 'Dangerous Woman'

If you are an Ariana fan like me you will notice the references, mainly the chapter names but if you're not a fan, I hope you just enjoy reading this book!

I've set out for this book to be about 15-16 parts so I'm going to try and update kinda every other day or just whenever I can!

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