Dangerous- An Everlark Fanfiction {COMPLETED}

[11] Dangerous Woman

Katniss POV
two days later

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love- "UGH" I moan as my hands grip my hair.

I love you. That's all that's been going through my head for the past two days. I've tried the whole, 'he didn't mean it' but something tells me that even in his state of arousal, Peeta would not have said those words if he didn't mean them. Which makes all this even more complicated.

I try to go over the old fashioned list of 'pros and cons' about this whole situation. I've actually made a list, this has been eating me up that much.

Pros -

I feel safe
I feel secure
No more having to worry about him leaving me
I feel happy
I AM happy
Makes me laugh
Makes me smile
Cooks me food, real good food
Great sex
Treats me like I'm the one for him
Makes me feel sexy
Makes me feel confident

Cons -

Letting someone in can hurt
Giving my feelings away hurts
What if I get hurt?
What if he turns out like Gale?
He could break my heart
He could break my spirit
He could hurt me
He could always leave
What if I get hurt?
What if he does the same thing as Gale?
He could hurt me
What if I get hurt?
I can't get hurt

I ended up putting down my pen when I realised I was writing the same thing over and over again hurt.

It's true, he could hurt me, but then I have to ask myself, is he worth the risk of heart ache? And I knew my answer straight away.

Of course he is.

It's been months since Gale and the more I start thinking about it, the more I realise that in these past few months, I've not thought of Gale at all.

I begin to wonder why. But of course I already know the answer to that. Peeta is why. I've been so happy with Peeta that I've not thought about Gale but then another question comes to my mind. Why Peeta?

Out of all the people in the world, why Peeta? There are so many blonde, attractive men in the world, so why him? Why did I pick that guy at the bar. There were lots of guys at that bar the day I first saw him. Why did I go to the lonely one sitting at the end of it? And for once, I can't answer my questions, how can I?

If I was talking to my sister, she would say it is fate and about 6 months ago I would've laughed in her face. But now that I'm at this point, maybe it's true. Maybe it was my fate to meet Peeta and it might still be my fate to realise that I'm in love with him.

I turn to look back at my list and notice something. Under the word 'Pros' I see these are things that Peeta actually does and actually makes me feel. I then look under the word, 'Cons' and see my fears. Not things that Peeta have done but my fears that he will do. That he could do.

I guess that's my answer, or in fact my question, 'Is it worth it?' Is it worth it to risk falling back into that dark hole again, to risk being unhappy, to risk the hurt and the rejection again?

Of course my answer is the same as before, Peeta is and always has been worth the risk.

Wether I've noticed it before, I've become a different person with him, I've become a confident, strong, kind, sexy women. And that's all down to Peeta. He's rubbed off on me.

There are times when he's made me feel scared, sad, unhappy but those are only moments in time. He's made me feel dangerous. And I like that.

I decide then and there that I am completely, head over heels in love with Peeta Mellark.