A Darker Leopard

Chapter nine: Crushing guilt

That was the last show of the night. I was dragged back inside from the crowd's view and back to my cage. As I solemnly walked down the path, I could hear triumphant chanting. I don't want this anymore, I just killed my brother. 'You're a cold blooded killer, just look at yourself!'

Back in my cage, my water and food had been filled and I curled up in the furthest corner.
"It's my little champion!" The she-cat smiled. I curled up tighter. Her grin faded. "What's wrong? You're alive! You alone have given the rest of us hope. You should be happy..." I only whispered my pain. She pressed herself up against the bars and attempted to reach me with an outstretched paw. "What's the matter?" She repeated.
"Is this my life now?" I uttered. She took a few moments to process what I had said as she struggled to hear me.
"I don't understand-"
"I JUST KILLED MY OWN BROTHER!" I mewled, burying my blood red face into her fur. She gently licked my wounds and I purred gratefully.

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I am numb to any feelings of grief for my defeated enemies, but I still have a lingering sense of guilt knowing that my own brother had died because of my violence and blinding anger. This is my life now; an endless cycle of blood and death. Some scars never heal.

A loathsome human strides over to the cage beside me, the leopardess' cage. The loop is wrapped around her neck with hardly any fuss and she was once again, dragged away. Each time we are separated, I fear that one of us will never return. I dread the day I'll have to kill her. These games are cruel shows in which some victors don't even survive the night due to their injuries. I watch on as the battle between the she-cat and another female slowly became more intense. Then she makes a deadly mistake...

She let her guard down as she began to tire, leaving herself open for a blow to the head. She toppled over onto the floor and the other female pinned her down. I watched in horror as the other female sank her teeth deep into her neck. The leopardess gasped for air, eyes wide.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

I shout at the top of my lungs, fighting tears. Her eyes eventually glazed over and her struggling body went limp.

I'm shaking in my hostility. The next and final fight is about to start. The human comes over the the cages.

Pick me! Pick me! I must take my revenge!

Unfortunately, I'm not to fight today. The human walks right past me and another cat does as I desired to.

I wished I was chosen, I would've let that wretched killer suffer!

Look at yourself, you really are a monster.

What have I become? A cold blooded killer.