latibule ➳ bucky barnes

15. forgiveness

Bucky, Sam and Steve sat in front of each other in a circle, staring into space. No one uttered a single word, they were still in shock.

It was only moments ago that Anastasia confessed everything to them; her past, what happened in 2014, why Chase had information on HYDRA but most importantly, who she really was. To say they were shocked was an understatement.

Bucky, especially, took it the hardest. He had known Arnim Zola the longest. That man was the one who gave him an arm and brainwashed him into oblivion after all. Arnim Zola was a coward who hid behind powerful people. He ran and did what he had to do to save himself. Working under HYDRA, he conducted sinister human experiments, one which involved Bucky. He created weapons of mass destruction, he created monsters and chaos. His very name made Bucky's blood boil.

Now, he discovered that Anastasia was that man's granddaughter.

Bucky didn't understand how such a kind woman could be related to someone like Arnim Zola. Though her intelligence and hesitant, almost cowardly nature could be explained and identified, Anastasia Volkov had a heart of gold, contrasting the blackness of Zola's. Bucky honestly couldn't understand how they were related.

Of course, there could be a side of Anastasia he haven't seen yet. She may be like her grandfather. Bucky had known some folks who were exactly like their ancestors. He also knew people who could play a victim to conceal their true face. Anastasia could be the same.

All the memories and emotions of the experiments he had undergone flooded back to him, and his body tensed, his metal arm twitched dangerously, clicking and making suspicious noises.

He was trembling in fear. Flashes of what had been done to him, what Zola had done to him, replayed in his mind in an endless loop. All he could think of was the terrors Zola put him through, and the fear that Anastasia may turn out the same.

"Ana's still Ana." Steve muttered, knowing exactly what Bucky had been thinking about, "I know Zola had done some pretty messed up things to you, but you got to understand that Ana is not like him. She's different."

"How would you know?" Bucky demanded, his voice shaking slightly, "you don't know her. We don't know her, how many more secrets is she keeping?"

"You're letting your fear get the best of you." Steve stated.

"You really think Ana is anything like Zola? Our Ana?" Sam questioned, slightly angry that Bucky would even think of such a possibility.

"I... I don't know." Bucky murmured, feeling ashamed.

"This is why she didn't want to tell us." Sam said, "she was afraid of the exact reaction you're having right now."

Bucky stayed silent, knowing Sam was correct. No wonder she had been so afraid to tell them, especially him. She knew the crimes her grandfather had committed. She didn't want anything to do with him. Revealing her relation to him only reminded her of whose blood flowed in her veins.

Bucky controlled his breathing and forced himself to calm down. He stopped his body from trembling and shut his eyes tightly, clearing his mind.

He recalled the words he spoke to Anastasia before he dragged her back to the tower. He had told her that the Avengers were already sinners, she couldn't do any worse... yet he dared to think of the possibility that she could betray them.