Kairo's Encyclopaedia of Random: Book 2

Eurovision 2016 post show review

*sigh* this is gonna hurt
This year threw so many screwballs at me
LIKE ICELAND PLACING LOWER THAN SAN MARINO AND MONTENEGRO
AND ESTONIA COMING LAST IN SF 1
AND GEORGIA QUALIFYING
AND UKRAINE SNATCHING VICTORY FROM OUR HANDS
ahem
Let me compose myself and we'll begin

SEMI FINAL 1
<<Finland>>
Song: Sing It Away by Sandhja
Place: 15th (SF)
This one was kinda iffy live. The studio version was better. But eh, got me dancing

<<Greece>>
Song: Utopian Land by Argo
Place: 16th (SF)
I saw the translations of the rap parts for the first time and I swear I pissed myself laughing at some of the lines, especially "Vodka it is, and grandma's frying fish."
I knew this wouldn't qualify, and I'm okay with it. Still like the song

<<Moldova>>
Song: Falling Stars by Lidia Isac
Place: 17th (SF)
I swear the backing music was too loud. I could barely hear her. Plus the astronaut was too distracting.
This one's a meh

<<Hungary>>
Song: Pioneer by Freddie
Place: 4th (SF), 19th (final)
The backing singers really needed the glowing stick thingies from the national final. It just looked weird without them. But the song was well executed.

<<Croatia>>
Song: Lighthouse by Nina Kraljić
Place: 10th (SF), 23rd (final)
Like Finland, this one was a bit iffy live. And the costumes were a bit over the top.
I still liked it, don't get me wrong, and in happy it qualified

<<The Netherlands>>
Song: Slow Down by Douwe Bob
Place: 5th (SF), 11th (final)
It was good, but didn't deserve a spot in the final. And what were the ten seconds of silence for?
DOUWE BOB TOOK GRETAS SPOT IN THE FINAL AND I WILL NEVER FORGIVE HIM FOR IT.
Sorry. I needed something to take my anger out on

<<Armenia>>
Song: LoveWave by Iveta Mukuchyan
Place: 2nd (SF), 7th (final)
THIS ONE JUST CAME OUT OF NOWHERE LIKE WOW IVETA
she has nice legs
BUT WOW THIS SONG
ITS TAKING OVER MEEEEEEE

<<San Marino>>
Song: I Didn't Know
Place: 12th (SF)
12th place. Are you serious Europe. This dude can barely sing.
Sure, the performance was hilarious, but 12th place?
I give up.

<<Russia>>
Song: You Are The Only One by Sergey Lazarev
Place: 1st (SF), 3rd (final)
We all knew this was gonna do well
HE WAS CLIMBING ON THE BACKDROP LIKE WUT I DIDNT KNOW YOU COULD DO THAT.
Im happy with where it placed. But I feel people didn't vote for the actual song, just the staging and Sergey.
Also my sister said his shirt needed to be tighter

<<Czech Republic>>
Song: I Stand by Gabriela Gunčíková
Place: 9th (SF), 25th (final)
THEY QUALIFIED FOR THE FIRST TIME CONGRATS
and then got completely forgotten about in the final heh
I liked it. Kinda. It did better than the shoe throw.
But this is still meh

<<Cyprus>>
Song: Alter Ego by Minus One
Place: 8th (SF), 21st (final)
WOW THIS WAS AWESOME
I LOVED IT
SO GLAD IT MADE IT
HOWLING
CAGE ROCKERS
WHAT MORE CAN YOU WANT

<<Austria>>
Song: Loin d'ici by Zoë
Place: 7th (SF), 13th (final)
This was so pretty
I'm so glad it qualified man you have no idea I was really worried about it.
This performance just oozed positivity.

<<Estonia>>
Song: Play by Jüri Pootsmann
Place: 18th (SF)
Poor Jüri
He didn't deserve last.
The performance was really good!
Although the card tricks were kinda gimmicky
#justiceforjüri