The world is ugly

Seven

"You have reached the voice mail box of Alice Iero, I can't come to the phone right now so leave a message after the tone."

Quinn growled and hung up the phone, resisting the urge to chuck it as far away from her as possible.

"Damnit Alice."

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"What do you want to do with all of his clothes?"  Honey asked, he was loading all of Mike's clothing into a series of boxes, labeled 'goodwill' and 'Mike's folks'. so far, that was all I was willing to do with the clothing, I sure as hell didn't think I could keep all of his things in the apartment and then not go totally insane.

"I want to save a few things, I said as I snatched Mike's favorite Rolling Stones t-shirt from the 'goodwill' box. "But the majority can go to good will, I don't really have a use for them." My job was to pull my clothing out of his dresser, they were all clustered into one dresser.

"Letterman?" Mike asked. it was a dingy thing, horribly dirty because mike never let me wash the damn thing.

"Gimme." I cupped my hands and he threw it at me. I put it in the box for his parents. So far, our engagement rings, a few photos, Mike's diploma and a therapy book sat in the box. There was a loud noise outside of the apartment,  followed by Killjoy barking and Honey went to investigate.

"Be right back baby girl, don't get all emotional while I'm gone." He called, I sat on the bare bed and lifted the letterman to my nose, inhaling deeply. Killjoy barked louder, but I ignored him as I found myself thrown into another memory.

"Alice, let me in!" Mike yelled, he was outside our apartment, I'd thrown him and the girl I found him with out of the apartment and was packing a bag to leave.

"Go to hell Mike." I yelled through the door, when I heard honey honk the horn from the street below I opened up the door and made a mad dash for the stairs.

"Baby, please." Mike tried, he pulled himself to his feet, swaying slightly as he did.

"No, Mike I can't do this anymore."

"Can't do what?" he called, as I dashed down the stairs. "Can't stay faithful to one man?" that was his current theory,  that I was sleeping with someone else. I'd like to point it out to him that he was the one being unfaithful, not me. but he never seemed to want to listen to what I had to say anymore.

"IS SHE HERE?" I groaned internally, because in my head, I could see him standing outside the apartment, trying to get in and see me.

"Ronnie, man, we talked about this." Honey said, I watched from the front door as he tried to talk down my uncle.

"I don't understand why she won't see me." He said, his shoulders slumped and he leaned heavily into honey.

"I know, she's not ready yet. She'll come to you when she's ready." Honey said, rubbing circles into his back. I had a feeling, that this wasn't the first, or even the second time this had happened. Maybe fifty times before Ronnie lost his anger, maybe another fifty times before honey was able to comfort him like that.

"I just want to see her again." He said, honey nodded, a sympathetic look on his face. "I'm getting old James."

"I know, she'll talk to you soon, I know it." He said, smoothing over the hurt in Ronnie's posture. I wondered how long he'd waited before trying to get in touch with me, or if he waited at all.

It was a while before Honey came back upstairs, but when he did, I was sitting on the floor in the bedroom pulling clothing from Mike's dresser and putting in into boxes. Killjoy whined slightly when Honey opened the apartment door, but other than that he stayed quiet. Honey came back inside, after Ronnie walking Ronnie down stairs. He saw the look on my face and signed.

"So, how much did you hear?" he asked, I shrugged and picked up a few shirts from the bedroom floor.

"Enough, I guess." I muttered. It always marveled me how much crap Honey went through to make sure that I was comfortable. Honey sighed, scratching the back of his head.

"Look boss, don't be mad, okay? I just sent him away a few times, cuz I knew you weren't ready to talk to him."

"I'm not mad." I said, Honey raised his eyebrows.

"Huh? really?" he asked.

"Yeah, I get it." I said, I took out a roll of tape and closed up the box before sealing it.

"I find that very hard to believe." Honey said, "But as long as I'm not being kicked out, I wont push my luck." With a smile we worked in silence until the sun went down. Honey and I pack about fifteen boxed worth of stuff for good will, and three for Mike's mom. Honey had picked out some of Mike's things to give the rest of the boys, he said that in a month or to we could have a little party,- just people from our unit- and hand out gifts to everyone.

"So do you want to crash here?" I asked, Killjoy had taken over the left half od the bed and was happily snoring away. I knew Honey had a boyfriend, and I figured he'd want to go home to him. "Or?"

"Nah, I need to head home, Chad'll start to worry if I'm not home by eight." Honey said, I handed him his coat and we walked together to the front room. "If you want, I'll come over tomorrow, ya know bring breakfast and we can finish the rest of the house."

"Yeah, we can do that." I said, I stood at the door as he put his jacket on. "Bring Chad with you, I'd love to meet him." I said, I gave Honey a smile, one that he returned.

"Ya know? I think He'd like that. " he turned to leave, but stopped himself.  "Ya know, Alice, do me a favor."

"Hm?"

"Stay away from Frank. I had Chad look into him at work and all-" I gave honey a face, and he faltered slightly, "-Don't give me that look. Just, there is no 'Frank Way'"

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Like, there has never been a Frank Way, He's not related to Quinn, that's for damn sure. We cant seem to find him on any of the police data bases." my mind clouded dover for a moment, processing what Honey had said. It took a moment for it all to sink in,

"You were spying on my friend?" I asked, I could feel my temper rising slightly as I said it, like saying it out loud made it more true.  Honey's whole dimer deflated, and it looked like he was scrambling to back track what he said.

"Wait, no Alice, of course you'd take that what from this, that's not what it was and you know I I was just-"

"Just what James? " I dropped his nickname and crossed my arms over my chest. He used to say that I looked like his Mam when I did this, like he had skipped out at school and his mama was waiting for him when he got home with a wooden spoon in her hand.

"Damn it Alice, don't look at me like that. I was doing it because I'm worried about you, alright?" he said.

"Well don't worry Honey, I can take care of my self. I have for the majority of my life."

"Alice-"

"Get out." I pushed him out the door and slammed it closed. I heard him sigh from the other end.

"I'll see you in the morning Alice." He called.

"Don't bother!" I yelled back.

"I love you!" he called, I smiled, in spite of myself.

"Go fuck yourself James."

"NAh, Ill have chad do that for me!"