Captain America x Reader Imagines

Imagine 10

**suicidal thoughts/ actions warning**
You suffer from severe depression and it was hard. You worked as an avenger and was constantly bringing everyone down. Your life was pointless. You had no purpose on this earth, so at least you thought
"Steve, you have to talk to her. I know for a fact she likes you.. A lot." Natasha says chasing Steve down the hall.
"It doesn't change the fact that I can't. Natasha, I'm almost 100. She's 26."
"Technically..."
"Technically nothing, Nat. I'm done with this conversation.
Meanwhile, you were in your room crying. You don't quite know why, you just.. Were. It happens a lot more than it should. All of a sudden you heard a knock at your door.
***Steve's POV***
I  like her. Scratch that. I love her. Y/N was everything I love. Everything I wanted, needed. She was perfection in one human. How was I gonna get her to love me in return?
I knocked on her door hoping for a happy Y/N. But I knew that wasn't what was going to happen. She was always sad. Which brought me down as well. She opened the door and all I could see was her tear stained face.
"Y/N, are you alright?"
"Yeah Steve, I'm good."
"No you're not, tell me what's wrong."
"ADo you know that feeling? When you're just waiting. Waiting to get home, into your room, close the door, fall onto your ever so comfy bed & just let everything out that you kept in all day. That feeling of both relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong. Nothing is right either. And you're tired.. Tired of everything, tired of nothing. And you just want someone to be there and tell you it's okay. But no one's going to be there. And you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you're tired of waiting. Tired of being the one to fix yourself and everyone. Tired of being strong. And for once, you just want everything to be easy. To be simple. To be helped. To be saved. But you know you won't be. But you're still hoping. And you're still wishing. And you're still staying strong with tears in your eyes. You're fighting. Steve, I'm fighting. I'm always bringing everyone down and I'm done. Completely done. Steve, I think you should leave."
I didn't want to go. I would feel terrible but I knew I should respect her. So I left. Big mistake.
**Y/Ns POV**
Steve left and you felt terrible for what you did but you didn't want to bring him into the sad, lonely world that you live in. You closed the door behind him and locked it. You walked over to your dresser and grabbed the gun from under your socks.
"Maybe the world is better this way." You say as you put your gun up to your temple.
Bang
**steves pov**
"Y/N!"
That gunshot couldn't have come from her room, no, it couldn't have. I ran back to her door and tried to open it. Locked. I kicked it down. The sight that was in front of me was my worst nightmare. Y/N, lying in a pool of her own blood.
"No... No no no no." I say running over to her.
"Y/N, why did you do this. I love you. No. No, this isn't real. I love you so much. I can't express what I feel for you. Please don't go, Y/N, please."