The Billionaire's Awakening (Unedited Version)

Chapter 21: Heartache

"Tears are words the mouth can't say nor can the heart bare." ― Joshua Wisenbaker

Vicky's POV

As soon as I got inside my room, I let the tears free. My chest is so heavy, so were my eyes from the emotions I've been holding the whole time. I was just happy for like twenty-four hours and then lost it in just a second. 

I chuckled humorously as the scene at the Mailov's dining room flashes in my head once more. How confident Cassie to show up and claiming her baby was Xandrous is. How tough of her to come and fight for the right of her baby. 

If I knew I had a baby that time, would I have the balls to tell Xandrous? Or fight for my baby's right? 

Again, the thought of losing Xandrous, and then my lost baby made me feel all the more vulnerable. The tears kept streaming, incessantly. I felt like there no point in living anymore. I feel empty, like a part of my body has gone, and it's just left this pain that won't go away. And I knew I will never get over him. Never. I would always feel the fresh pain when I think of him. 

God, when am I going to have my happy ever after? Just like my mom? 

I trust Xandrous but what if he truly owns the baby? Can I really accept it? Living with him all the while he has a child with Cassie? 

I wipe my damp face and let my body drop on my bed. 

"My baby is Xandrous' baby. Don't be stupid, Ms. Pallos. We made this together with the same intention. I didn't force him,"  her words echoed in my head again like a mantra, I felt again the familiar pain. The feels like a sharp knife runs through your heart and left it bleeding, over and over.

We made this together with the same intention. I didn't force him. 

Her words kept echoing in my head and I'm beginning to believe it, especially when he said he's always drunk. Thinking that they have done it many times felt like a knife piercing my heart all the more. I felt like my life is meaningless again. That feeling of hopelessness, despondent, and desperate, took me all over again. 

"Why can't I be happy?" I murmured and chuckled lightly like a lost soul all the while wiping my non-stop tears. 

"Happiness comes after the tears, the pain, Just wait and don't lose hope, honey," I heard mom's voice and I quickly wipe my eyes and sat upright. She was standing on the door frame watching me with the same expression when Elle left. 

"Mom," I force a smile and she smiled back but I could feel the bitterness underneath that smile, for me.

She walks towards me and then perched on the side of my bed, pulling me closer to her and then hug me. "Trust Xandrous, honey. I think that Cassie was making it all up. After she schemed her leukemia, it's not surprising if she schemed her pregnancy as well," mom comforted and I unconsciously nodded. My tears starting dropping again like raindrops. 

"But what if the baby is his, mom?" I looked up to meet her eyes who was staring at me as well, sullenly. "He said he's always drunk, what if they did it many times, that why she got pregnant?" I wailed, my heart felt heavier all the more. My world collapsed at the thought. 

"Sshhh. Don't think of the negative things that could happen. Be positive, everything will go in place, just don't lose hope. If he loves you, he will fight for you, and marry you instead of that girl even if she's carrying his child," I look at mom again incredulously through the tears. 

Her palm rubbing my back in circles and I felt happy at some point that I have a mom like her. Very sweet and caring. She's the best mom. 

"Mom, I can't live with him if the baby is his? The baby needs his name, and I'm stealing that if I'll marry Xandrous knowing he has a child who needs his name and a father to look up," I shook my head in disapproval, all the while my heart sinking.