Write Better: Tips and tricks

I keep getting the same feedback!

I recently encountered a writer who told me that she was getting very frustrated because she wrote a story and everyone was telling her to slow it down. The readers didn't understand why things were happening because they were happening so fast. They said her story wasn't realistic, to which her reply was: it's a story. It shouldn't have to be realistic.

She summed up the story chapters for me, which I've changed here to keep it a secret.

Chapter one:

After years of torment, Betsy finally confronts the girls at summer camp who always tease her about her bathing suit one-piece. She's been bullied for years, but she finally chases them away. Betsy is a tough girl and she's never told anyone, not even her parents, what happened to her every summer.

Chapter two:

Betsy sees this attractive guy at her new high school. She wants to talk to him, but suddenly she bursts into tears because he says something (not to her) that reminds her of someone at camp. Suddenly, another girl, Clarice, comes over and comforts Betsy, which results in Betsy suddenly telling her story to Clarice.

All this happens in maybe 1000 words (500ish per chapter).

So apparently, the story readers kept commenting that the story was moving too fast and they didn't understand why things were happening. I tried to point out to the writer that she identified the problem herself in her summary. You can't set up a character to never tell anyone, and then suddenly (that was her word choice, not mine) she cries, suddenly a person comes over, suddenly she tells this stranger.

At the end of the day, nothing I said to her, no examples I could give, were enough to convince her that she needed to spend more time setting the story up so it makes sense. She insisted that she was doing everything right and that two years of getting the same comments was because the readers weren't reading right.

She insisted she laid all the breadcrumbs.

I've said it in an earlier chapter, but I think it's worth repeating here as writers prepare for the Wattys 2016.

Writers know their story. Because of that, sometimes we forget that readers are hearing it for the first time. Sometimes we buzz through parts or cut bits out because we as the creator automatically can make the leap from A --to--> B. Thing is, readers who are new to the material can't always make that jump with us.

If you're getting a lot of the same feedback, it's important to take a look back and reflect -or ask someone you trust to who doesn't already know the story- on whether or not something's wrong.

You might think that you laid all the breadcrumbs to make a scene believable, but sometimes, especially if you keep hearing the same thing, it's worth it to go back and think about changing something.

In the case of this writer, she's not popular and the story, from my viewpoint, isn't going to get many more reads than it already has. It needs a lot of work to stand a chance of winning the wattys like she thinks it can. Is she going to do it? No. Is she frustrated that, of the few readers she gets, no one is reading past chapter two? Absolutely. She knows there's a problem and she's asked for help with that problem, but she's convinced she's already doing everything we've asked her to do.

Don't get stuck. Keep an open mind. Sometimes readers are wrong.

Sometimes they're right.