Head in the Clouds {Poetry}

Helper, not the helped.

i am the helper, not the helped.

come to me, and i will let you lean so deeply.

my mind screaming, falling so steeply.

you would think to find me laying still completely,

but no, here i am, getting up each morning.

my body barely able to support its own weight.

no one has mercy for me, they don't let me see straight.

i scream so silently, here i am and i wait.

i wait for you to notice that i have fresh scars on my wrists.

i wait for you to notice that i am not okay, that i am dying,

and no matter how hard i try, i can't stop lying.

these words stuck in my mind, my tongue tying.

i want you to see my pain, to see that the pain you suffer is mine as well.

that you aren't the only one suffering, you aren't the only one who wants to die.

every night i am stuck alone in my room begging myself to cry.

tears are dried and i am left in a hallow shell that's why i cannot cry.

i want to scream, to yell, to get you to notice that i am not okay.

you are not okay, your friend is not okay and your mother is not okay.

tell me why, you think you can demand all our attention,

to have us all fall so you can rise, you can stop this prevention.

and for your attention, dare i mention.

that yes, i have fallen too far to be saved.