The Words

Chapter 14

Darkness.

It's all I can see.

My head feels as though it's floating, retreading down a hazy river, and no amount of effort can make anything clear. Stars mark my line of vision, some fading, others forming. I'm delirious, unsure of where I'm at or how I got here. I try to retrace my steps, but the last thing I remember is Cayden promising me something.

Suddenly I see a faint light, and my eyes automatically attach to it, clinging to it for dear life. Someone calls my name, and I know I have to find whoever's trying to reach me, but my feet are unable to move. It feels as though my entire body is in slow motion, being held back by this invisible power, and every effort I make only makes it worse. I begin to drown in my own frustration, sinking deeper and deeper into oblivion, until everything completely fades to black, and my mind goes blank.

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My eyes snap open, and I'm immediately blinded by a bright light. As my vision settles, I realize that I'm laying in a bed, covered with a white scratchy sheet. To my right is a night stand with flowers, cards, and an abundance of medication. To my left is a machine with cords attached to my arm.

Fear settles in the bottom of my stomach. What happened?

As if reading my mind, someone clears their throat, and I look straight in front of me. To my surprise, I see an all too familiar face: Detective Danner.

"Well hello, sweetheart," he smirks. I try to sit up, but my head instantly pounds and my ribs scream in defiance. I suddenly realize that I'm injured and everything burns, as if my skin is radiating.

"What happened?" I ask, more to myself than him.

"You were in a car accident. Pretty awful one if I do say so myself," he replies.

A car accident? That's impossible. I haven't even been in a car since Raven and Cayden took Kyle and I to Raven's apartment. That was at least two days ago, but that means I haven't seen Cayden in at least two days. That's one too many.

"Where's Cayden?" I ask, suddenly worried that he could be hurt too, or worse...dead.

Detective Danner stares at me, clearly puzzled. "Cayden? Who is that sweetheart?"

My face boils with anger. "Don't play games we me, Danner. Where is Cayden?"

I can't believe Danner would even pretend that he didn't know Cayden. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't have betrayed Cayden, gotten Kyle and I kidnapped, or lost Cayden's trust. It's because of Danner that I'm in this mess to begin with, and that's no something I'm willing to joke about.

Again, though, Detective Danner stares at me as though I've lost my mind. "I'm sorry, Alaska, but I have no idea what you're talking about. I don't even know how you know my name."

I'm suddenly confused. How would I not know Danner's name? He's the one who sent me to find Cayden in the first place! My mind begins racing in a million different directions. "You mean you don't remember Cayden Bates? My neighbor who allegedly stole drugs from the Cancer Center and sold them on the black market? The one who you sent Kyle and I to find?"

"Alaska, sweetheart, I think you may have dreamt all this. You were in a car accident the night before your graduation. A car ran into you while you were long boarding, and you've been in a coma ever since."

I'm stunned into silence. A car accident? A coma? There's no way anything he's telling me is true, and even if it were, there's no way I could experience a dream that complex. How would I know Detective Danner's name or even Kyle's for that matter if I had been in a coma this whole time? How would I have experienced all the horrible and amazing things I've experienced in the past month?

"That's not possible," I say frantically. "How do I know you and your partner's name?"

Detective Danner's face becomes calm, as though he's recited the answer he's about to give me a million times. "Detective Sholts and I were around you a lot after the accident and while you were in the hospital. Your subconscious must've picked up on simple names or little details from our cases and then form them into a complex dream. I know it's hard to believe, but almost all patients who wake up from a coma experience these lifelike dreams."

"And what? I'm supposed to believe your diagnosis? You're not even a certified doctor," I spit.

I'm angry now, confused. Hurt. It felt as though I had been living my life, for the very first time, but was it really all just a dream? Small tears begin to form in my eyes as my brain tries to create any other excuse to make what happened in my "dream" actually real, but the more I try and think, the more Danner's reasoning makes sense. The past month of my "life" doesn't seem like something I would've ever done. It doesn't seem like something I would've wanted. It doesn't sound like me.

"I'm sorry, Alaska," Detective Danner whispers. "I hope you can eventually come to some sort of reasoning with yourself. I am glad you're awake, though. You left your friends and family with quite a scare."

I bow my head in sorrow, ashamed that I'm acting crazy, and ashamed that I believed every second of my dream was real. Detective Danner stands up, giving me one more look of pity, and then walks out of the room. Immediately my parents come rushing in, Auby cautiously following behind. He looks scared, terrified, and I suddenly realize that he's afraid of me. My heart twists, and it takes everything I have to swallow back the tears.

Who am I anymore?

Who is Alaska Kingsley?

~~~

I know this chapter is short, but this was a good stopping point. I apologize for the delay in updates. My life has been crazy, and I literally have no free time on my hands. I will try to update as frequently as possible, but I don't know how often that will be.

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