My Secrets ~ GerPan

Chapter 8

Ludwig wasn't at school today or yesterday. He's always at school. He has perfect attendance. Maybe he's sick. No, then he would have texted me. Maybe he got beat up by his dad again. Hopefully it's not that. To take my mind off of it I will clean the house, or walk Pochi. Hmm. Yao can clean the house. I'll just go walk Pochi.

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We walked down the street a ways before Pochi pulled me into the forest. He kept barking and sniffing around for something. I had no idea where I was going and knew if I went to far I wouldn't know how to get out. Just before I was about to stop him and turn around he halted and looked up. He barked and looked back at me. I tilted my head to glance at what it was.

It was Ludwig, in all his shirtless glory. He was sleeping on a tree, in what seemed like a very uncomfortable position.

"Oi! You might hurt your neck like that!" I called to him. He jerked awake, and nearly fell out of the tree.

"Hey, Kiku. What are you doing here?"

"Walking my dog. What are you doing here?"

"Sleeping," he leaped out of the tree and almost landed on Pochi.

"Don't kill him!"

"Sorry," there was a silence before Ludwig yawned and blinked a few times, "I ran away. My dad beat me again, my brother walked in on it, and my mom just watched," He said it as if it was the most casual thing ever. I was a little shocked at that. By the look on his face he was too. "I guess that water healed me emotionally, too." he whispered.

"What?"

"Nothing. I've just been having a pretty horrible couple of days," Ludwig bent down to pet Pochi. He had dogs of his own. It looks like he's not going home anytime soon, so he won't be able to see them.

"I'm sorry. Your parents really are idiots. Your brother helped right? I'm sure he did."

"He tried, at least." he leaned against a tree and sighed.

"You must be hungry. I can run back and get you something."

"It's o-," his stomach grumbled before he could answer, "Ja, okay."

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I quickly threw several snacks into a lunch box and rushed back out to the forest. My parents didn't even seem to notice. Ludwig was leaned up against the tree, the pale moonlight hitting his bare skin perfectly. His eyes glistened, and he smiled down at me as I handed him the box. I.. couldn't take my eyes of of him, to put it simply. The sight was simply inexpressible. His outstretched wings, unblemished skin, all of it made me think more and more that this had to be a dream. He's got to be some kind of angel.

"Are you alright?" he asked me with a worried look. I nodded and  looked down. We stood there in silence. I contemplated just going home. I wanted to stay with him, but he probably wanted to be alone now.

"Join me?" I looked up at his once again smiling face.

"Really?" I asked.

"Of course," he handed me the box, and walked behind me. "What are you-" Ludwig grabbed me by the waist and flew upwards into the tree. It was incredibly scary, but a nice feeling. He set me down as gently as he could. I handed the box back.

"Danke," I watched his face as he smiled at the snacks i had packed. It was mostly stuff only sold in Japan. I knew he especially liked those, so I made sure to take a lot of them. I tried not to stare at him eat the whole time, and occupied myself by trying to find constellations in the clear night sky.

"Oops," I heard Ludwig say, "I dropped a little bit off the tree." I chuckled at his embarrassed expression. I lifted my hand to wipe of a crumb from his cheek. He looked at me with a strange look. I can see why. I'm usually against touching people, or people touching me.

Suddenly, I remembered. I kissed him on that same cheek yesterday. What am I supposed to do? This is getting awkward.

"Um, you had a crumb on our cheek," I mumbled. Well, that didn't make anything better. Nice job me. Ludwig probably won't say anything about it. He's always had trouble dealing with his feelings, and actually so have I. That's why he never comes to me about it.

"Kiku."

Is he actually going to say something about it?

"Thanks again for this."

No, okay.

"And about yesterday,"

Kuso.

"What...was that?"

I panicked. I didn't even know what I was doing.

"I...um...don't know," I had no idea what to say.

"Is that what normal friends do?" I was fairly certain it wasn't, but I couldn't blame him. Ludwig hadn't had any other friends before me.

"No. I just..." I had to tell him. I had to get it off my chest once and for all. But I don't have to tell him in English.

"Suki da," There. It'll take him a while to figure that out, so I'll have time to mentally prepare myself for rejection. There was a long silence. I looked up at him expecting to see confusion, but instead shock.

"Wait, really?" he asked, hopeful. What did he mean 'Really?' Did he understand me? Oh fuck he watches anime, of course he understood me.

"Uh, yes." he looked down at the box and back at me. He slowly set it down on the space next to him and glanced embarrassed back at me.

"What should I do?" he turned his body towards me and made small awkward motions with his hands. "What do people normally do in this type of situation?" What did that mean? Was he actually going to-?

"I'm not sure myself," I couldn't find anything else to say. I knew what I wanted, but flat out saying it to him would make things even more awkward.

"I r-read in a book once that sometimes people...kiss," he blushed and looked down. Is he really going to do it? Ludwig's not rejecting me?

"Oh," I was at a loss for words. Ludwig and I were close friends, but not what most people consider close friends. We barely ever laid a hand on each other. We've told secrets, but not the kind you hear girls telling each other. Our feelings had always been a mystery. And to all of a sudden show so many feelings... It wrecked my nerves, to say the least. But I wanted this, and I could tell by the look on Ludwig's face that he did too.

"Can I kiss y-"

"Yes."

I leaned forward, and finally our lips connected for the first time. Ludwig seemed to freeze up so I started to pull away, but he reached up and pulled me back. His lips were warm and tasted a little bit like seaweed, but that was alright. Neither I nor Ludwig had kissed anyone before, so it was a bit awkward. Nonetheless, it felt right. I broke the kiss for air, and looked back up at his shimmering eyes. He looked back at me, breathless, but smiling. We chuckled and leaned our foreheads against each others. He held my hand in his slightly bigger one, and ran his ringers over it.

"I like you too," he said, and I couldn't have been more reassured.

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Kuso - Japanese for shit/fuck

Suki da - I like you

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A/N: Sorry for the super late chapter! I'll try my best to get one up tomorrow :)